Author Topic: Contrary to popular belief, (Read 5236 times)

tomduo · « **on:** Apr 11, 2006, 12:08:41 PM »

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

Max Con · « **Reply #1 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 01:00:02 PM »

This was old in November.

Rama · « **Reply #2 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 03:43:56 PM »

Eh.... it's new to me and I enjoyed it.

tomduo · « **Reply #3 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:08:08 PM »

I've been terrorizing my friends with it, since I have seen it on sports center.

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #4 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:43:03 PM »

Chuck NOrris' Girlfriend once asked him, "How much Wood could a Woodchuck Chuck if a Woodchuck Could Chuck Wood?" Chuck Norris then Grabbed his girlfriend by the throat, ripped her vocal chords out, then watched as she bled to death and said to her:
"Don't Fuck with Chuck."

TM2 Rampage · « **Reply #5 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:48:34 PM »

It was better when it was about Vin Diesel.

The D · « **Reply #6 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:51:53 PM »

Wow, now that Tom is recycling ancient internet cliches, I'm not the lamest person on the board.

*cracks open some liquor in celebration*

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #7 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:53:14 PM »

No, you're still the lamest. Tom at least has Spider-Man for an avatar. You have a Little Girl. Which is not only lame, but sad.

The D · « **Reply #8 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 04:54:22 PM »

Quote

No, you're still the lamest. Tom at least has Spider-Man for an avatar. You have a Little Girl. Which is not only lame, but sad.

You need to refresh your cache. Tom now has Chuck Norris for an avatar.

Rama · « **Reply #9 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 05:09:16 PM »

Maybe you and Tom could fight it out in the Thunderdome for the title of lamest guy on the board.

TWO MEN ENTER! ONE MAN LEAVES!

The D · « **Reply #10 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 05:12:44 PM »

He has a girlfriend, and a hot one at that, so he would probably win. Unless there's some advantage I have I don't see.

Rama · « **Reply #11 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 05:16:40 PM »

Nope...I guess you could just give up now like a French man.

tomduo · « **Reply #12 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 07:22:27 PM »

What about the lameness that is E? He's an Emu farmer? Or IDE, who's only real claim to fame is that he has moobs? Or Bitch even!?

Max Con · « **Reply #13 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 07:42:16 PM »

At least E can command his emu to eat you alive.

tomduo · « **Reply #14 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 08:08:25 PM »

I'd fuck it up, and then make Emu Fajitas. OLE!

B E C K · « **Reply #15 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 10:04:28 PM »

No Emu fucking allowed! Only Emu/Launchpad yaoi!

tomduo · « **Reply #16 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 10:18:38 PM »

What about Emo fucking? There's alot of crying involved...

B E C K · « **Reply #17 on:** Apr 11, 2006, 10:56:45 PM »

Yet the image of a Peanut wanting an Emu burns my brain.

tomduo · « **Reply #18 on:** Apr 12, 2006, 12:29:54 AM »

I love da teeth.

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #19 on:** Apr 12, 2006, 10:42:45 AM »

Me? Lame? WOW. HOW ORIGINAL!
Don't make me hurt you.

Rama · « **Reply #20 on:** Apr 12, 2006, 11:39:21 AM »

Please Hammer....don't hurt him.

tomduo · « **Reply #21 on:** Apr 12, 2006, 02:37:22 PM »

Hebrew Hammer?!

Rama · « **Reply #22 on:** Apr 12, 2006, 03:57:21 PM »

Funny....he doesn't look jewish.