Author Topic: Cock Blocking (Read 17233 times)

IDE · « **on:** Dec 09, 2005, 03:28:08 AM »

This is a question to all the ladies of the board. Have you ever stopped your girl friend from banging out some guy just because he happens to ...actually that's too specific. Have you ever stopped your friend (who obviously wanted some action) from banging out a...yeah a random guy...a hot random guy.

Chopper Face 69 · « **Reply #1 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 05:51:33 AM »

Quote

...actually that's too specific.

I wanna hear what was supposed to go there.

Bitch · « **Reply #2 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 07:13:30 AM »

I second that motion.

Merla · « **Reply #3 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 07:39:29 AM »

I have no idea what you are talking about.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #4 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 09:00:10 AM »

Extra Zero · « **Reply #5 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 09:54:35 AM »

That needs to be a shirt...

IDE · « **Reply #6 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 06:05:48 PM »

I was a little drunk but I think what was supposed to go there was "Just because he happens to be a bouncer that she just met in a bar"

(Sorry it wasn't more spectacular)

tomduo · « **Reply #7 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 09:50:53 PM »

Dude, that always happens, it's why they get in groups. Best way to avoid it is to bite the bullet, and offer to buy them all drinks, then quickly as the one you want how she and her beautiful friends are. That way she knows you want her, and the friends have been called beautiful and get a free drink.

IDE · « **Reply #8 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 10:55:07 PM »

I might as well repost the whole story from another board so you can fully grasp the situation:

So right before we close I meet Gennyva. A hot ass little latina chick from miami. Her phone isn't working so she tells me to face book her...(shyea...vampires don't use face book bitch people will expose us as undead predators for shits and giggles). So I ask her what she's doing after this and she asks me to come back to her place.

So I do.

I pull up and ring the door bell and I'm about to leave when her friends pull up and drop her off.

"What are you doing here pot belly's security?" calls out her friend.

"Social Call" I replied.

So then she gets dropped off and we go inside and start making out. Now this is her last night in town. There is only reason you call me over to your apartment the first night you meet me when it's your last night in town. She tells me to stay as long as I want and offers me a shot. I've got my shoes off and I'm sitting on the bed when there is a loud KNOCK at the door...

her fucking friends are back...

one of them asks for a tampon and they go into the bathroom together. I'm a little tipsy but I already know what is going on...then her other friend says "You promised to sleep over at my house!" ....

THIS IS A COCK BLOCK!

Now part of me wanted to say "Look you stupid bitches. I know you don't need a tampon and she never said she'd spent the night at your place. I'm out of here you worthless slut bags." But I played it cool and was all "oh really? ok..." (in a sarcastic "yeah right" manner) and then she gave me her number. Now you're thinking "well what good is that shit? She's leaving town forever." Well if you recall in the beginning of this post I told you she was from Miami...which is exactly where your humble narrator is from.

So when I go home for christmas break I am going to call this bitch and if there is a god in heaven I am going to bend her over and go town on that round latin ass while taking a picture with camera phone. And when I return here to tallahassee i will find her bitchy sorority sisters and show them what I did her... I DID THIS! THAT'S GENNY! I DID IT! WHERE'S YOUR TAMPON NOW?

How could this happen on my birthday?!

Rama · « **Reply #9 on:** Dec 09, 2005, 11:32:10 PM »

What you do is wait and watch....Then one will sperate from the rest. You know bathroom, get another drink something like that...When she does that you have to get into the gap and give chase. Then when she is least expecting it BAM! Right for the jugglar! They go down faster that way and and put up less fight. Now you might want to let go, but don;t. She might still be alive. So hold on to it till she stops kicking. Once that's done you drag her away and devour her at a place of your convience.

tomduo · « **Reply #10 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 02:30:57 AM »

No, then the friends will find her and pull her away.

"We need to TALK to _____."

She'll listen to her friends, and you'll be alone.

Max Con · « **Reply #11 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 03:24:27 AM »

That story completely failed to interest me in this thread.

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #12 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 09:10:03 AM »

Owch.

Faye Valentine · « **Reply #13 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 09:21:09 AM »

Quote

This is a question to all the ladies of the board. Have you ever stopped your girl friend from banging out some guy just because he happens to ...actually that's too specific. Have you ever stopped your friend (who obviously wanted some action) from banging out a...yeah a random guy...a hot random guy.

Nope.

My friends wouldn't do any random ugly guy, so they choose good :-D

B E C K · « **Reply #14 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 02:08:20 PM »

More importantly, who the hell name's their kid 'Gennyva'?

IDE · « **Reply #15 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 02:27:51 PM »

Quote

That story completely failed to interest me in this thread.

But you read the whole thing and thus my goal of wasting your time was achieved.

The D · « **Reply #16 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 02:35:00 PM »

If a girl you meet at a bar invites you into her house, it's saying one thing.

If she's not going to fuck your brains out, there's only one thing you do. Knock her out and rape her silly.

IDE · « **Reply #17 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 02:39:04 PM »

If only I'd had a tire iron...we coud've had a foursome.

Faye Valentine · « **Reply #18 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 04:42:34 PM »

Quote

If a girl you meet at a bar invites you into her house, it's saying one thing.

If she's not going to fuck your brains out, there's only one thing you do. Knock her out and rape her silly.

you are so disgusting.

tomduo · « **Reply #19 on:** Dec 10, 2005, 05:47:21 PM »

He'd know about rape.

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #20 on:** Dec 11, 2005, 01:55:01 PM »

Holy crap, D. The hole you've dug just got a foot deeper. Jesus.

The D · « **Reply #21 on:** Dec 11, 2005, 09:57:08 PM »

You know how it is. Rape is another way of saying hello in Japan.

tomduo · « **Reply #22 on:** Dec 11, 2005, 10:04:57 PM »

Remind me to lube up before I go to Japan.

Rama · « **Reply #23 on:** Dec 11, 2005, 11:23:47 PM »

You should wait till you get there, cause if you do it too far in advance it'll dry out and it'll be more sticky then slick.

B E C K · « **Reply #24 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 06:51:16 PM »

Stop wanting to rape things, damn you.

TM2 Rampage · « **Reply #25 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 07:03:32 PM »

Did...

Did he just call himself a vampire?

B E C K · « **Reply #26 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 07:23:02 PM »

Who's a vampire? More importantly, where's my fucking garlic?

tomduo · « **Reply #27 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 07:52:34 PM »

Quote

You should wait till you get there, cause if you do it too far in advance it'll dry out and it'll be more sticky then slick.

I thought I'd just baste myself on the airplane like a sexual turkey.

IDE · « **Reply #28 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 07:55:10 PM »

That's a little injoke with some other people on the INTERNET about how I've decided to stay in college for all eternity, passing amongst the other students as if I were their own age. Singling out hot 18 yr old chicks to "prey" upon.

tomduo · « **Reply #29 on:** Dec 12, 2005, 07:58:54 PM »

Like Tom Green in Road Trip?