Bob Saget is dead.

[jonhammstein]

[B E C K]

First.




































No, wait, this isn't my post.  I was robbbbbbed! 


RIP Danny Tanner.  Crossing my fingers it wasn't auto-erotic asphyxiation but maybe that would've been a preferred way for him to go in his opinion.



Also... in looking to see if cause of death was noted yet, I found out Sinead O'Connor's 17-year-old son killed himself. Supposedly. It's really weird. He was in the hospital under suicide watch but they let him nope out of the hospital. Later he's found dead. Also, she's no longer Sinead O'Connor, she's Shuhada Sadaqat and she's converted to Islam. But she still performs under the name "Sinead O'Connor." And this is, like, the third time she'd changed her name completely.

[jonhammstein]

I'll admit to feeling slightly guilty about stealing your thunder as resident town crier for celebrity deaths.

But I really, really wanted to make my callous joke.

[B E C K]

If I could edit stuff, I'd extend that Voldy clip with silence at the end and overlay that "chew-beh-do-ba ba-wow!" sting from the end of the OG Full House theme song. Around 1:20 mark. (YouTube's weird about timestamps when I try to link like that here.)

[B E C K]

Bob Saget apparently hit his head and died. Still not a bad way to go, I'd think. Man, I hit my head on a thick metal rack at Home Depot late last year and the first thought in mind was "fuck, don't let me die from this like a poor man's Natasha Richardson." I hit pretty hard. Nice to know I'm not killable from something like that just yet. But sixties and up is like egg-cracking range for old people skulls, right?

[Rodent of Unusual Size]

The brain begins to shrink around age 60, which means bumps and whiplash can produce brain bleeds. So it didn't even have to be a severe lick on the head, which explains why he didn't think anything of it.

[B E C K]

Good to know. But, yeah, never realized until after he died that he was 6'4". Not as though he couldn't have been bending down and then stood up and took a crack on the head. (That's what basically happened to me at HomeDepot.)  But I suppose when it comes to tall folks, I'm always reminded of the dad in this one family my mom used to babysit for. Dude had to bend down like Gandalf entering a hobbit hole to get inside our house.

[B E C K]

Daily Mail is claiming Saget was killed with a baseball bat. Basically. Wtf.

I checked again just now to get the article link and now it's "he hit his head on marble, tucked himself into bed, and died."

Look, Daily Mail, is this a conspiracy or not? I need to know if it's Foil Hat Day. 

[jonhammstein]

Maybe he was pivoting into prop comedy and it all went sideways.

[B E C K]

Bob Saget snuff film: