Author Topic: Random shit with no unified subject matter: the thread. (Read 42731 times)

B E C K · « **Reply #120 on:** Sep 24, 2016, 03:55:25 AM »

Calling it now: Miss Peregrine's Home for Freaky British Children will flop. It's got the BFG problem. It has no idea who the audience is and appears similar to looks and tone to every other Harry Potter ripoff. Not to mention our standard Hollywood diversity: "We're not racist! We casted [ x ] Sam Jackson ~~[ ] Morgan Freeman~~, didn't we?"

joe · « **Reply #121 on:** Sep 27, 2016, 12:18:45 AM »

Wow! Karen Gillan! So spice!

I think I'm probably going to Peregrine this week, but man does it look like dogshit.

Tim Burton is truly awful!

Rama · « **Reply #122 on:** Sep 27, 2016, 06:39:17 PM »

The day I saw Mars Attacks was a sad day.....It was when I knew Burton was losing it. Although I did like Sleepy Hollow.

B E C K · « **Reply #123 on:** Sep 27, 2016, 11:46:33 PM »

I remember seeing Mars Attacks with some of my cousins when it came out. I distinctly remember wondering what the actual fuck was I watching. But the important thing I gleamed was the realization of how much I hate shit that boasts an "all-star" cast and how much self-wankery is typically involved.

Rama · « **Reply #124 on:** Sep 28, 2016, 08:14:51 AM »

I remember wondering if Jack Nicholson played two characters or the President just had multiple personality disorder and a really fast jet.

joe · « **Reply #125 on:** Sep 28, 2016, 06:52:29 PM »

Did you know Jack Black is in it? This was before anyone gave a fuck about Jack Black. He's just some random soldier who goes all gung-ho and gets incinerated immediately. In fact, I think his "graphic" death is what escalates the plot.

The CG in that movie has AGED. Man, has it aged.

B E C K · « **Reply #126 on:** Sep 29, 2016, 03:16:33 AM »

I didn't realize he was in that movie until I googled it two days ago.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #127 on:** Sep 29, 2016, 06:50:41 PM »

Talking about aging CGI...I watched Fellowship of the Ring the other day. Remember how great the CG looked in that and its subsequent movies? I never noticed it on my old TV, but it's rough to the point of distraction.

joe · « **Reply #128 on:** Sep 29, 2016, 11:45:48 PM »

It's been a while, but I seem to remember Fellowship being the least egregious of the three.

And it's positively modest compared to that unrepentant Hobbit trash.

B E C K · « **Reply #129 on:** Sep 30, 2016, 10:54:57 AM »

I haven't watched Rings lately. Certainly whenever I watch it on a high-end TV, I'll keep muh peepers open. Now Hobbit... all of those Hobbiteseses.... the CGI in those was soooo distracting. Even on a lower-end TV set and a single viewing. Legolas jumping around like PS1-era Tekken character with a glitch. The Donkey Kong barrels. Disgusting. So, yeah, those are examples from the second one but the point stands. (Oh... oh, yeah, from the first one... the Rube Goldberg-style dragon provoking. Yikes.)

joe · « **Reply #130 on:** Sep 30, 2016, 05:37:35 PM »

The dogs chasing shithead on his rabbit sled. FUCK. I remember sitting there in the theater wondering, "What the hell were they even thinking with this?"

B E C K · « **Reply #131 on:** Sep 30, 2016, 09:53:33 PM »

Quote from: joerammstein on Sep 30, 2016, 05:37:35 PM

The dogs chasing shithead on his rabbit sled. FUCK. I remember sitting there in the theater wondering, "What the hell were they even thinking with this?"

You know, I watched a cut of all three movies put into one and it still felt too long. The Hobbit was only meant to be one movie with a lot of shit cut out of it. That guy tho'... he was good for a laugh.

B E C K · « **Reply #132 on:** Sep 30, 2016, 10:16:51 PM »

I keep coming across Jumanji news. I recall, back when I bitched about Karen Gillian's outfit, reading (from the director or someone like that) that there was a good reason why she was dressed like a skank. Which, of course, I did a total eyeroll on. And I had read rumors it was because she's supposed to be a video game avatar. Which is still not an excuse, imo. Either commit to dressing her like a skank and tell the critics to sod off or maybe not dress her like a skank if you can't take the blowback. Because it's bullshit so you're gonna get blowback. They could've made her a cool Marion Ravenwood/Evie O'Connell type. It was completely their fucking choice. So now this article confirms they're avatars. I want this movie to bomb. I want it to bomb hard. I want it to bomb so hard that if it actually did, I dare say I might get some form of physical gratification from it. It has the Rock tho' and I don't recall the Rock having an outright bomb off the top of my head. I mean, shit like Race to Witch Mountain didn't do the giant bank anyone wanted but it didn't flop either.

Fiero · « **Reply #133 on:** Oct 03, 2016, 01:08:56 PM »

I always forget about this forum and then I come back and realize that catching up will be too much of a chore so I mostly just disappear again.

B E C K · « **Reply #134 on:** Oct 04, 2016, 01:07:58 AM »

I recommend just visiting on your phone when you're on the can. It's actually not as busy as it looks. Every four out of five posts is, like, me posting to myself.

Anyway, stuff like the music, tv, food, and anime threads don't require catch up. Just post about what you saw.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #135 on:** Oct 04, 2016, 07:12:21 PM »

Catching up will take all of five minutes. If it were my board, ten seconds...and then you'd realize it's only because I tend to cross-post.

joe · « **Reply #136 on:** Oct 04, 2016, 07:40:36 PM »

Just ignore most of my posts, I usually have nothing important to say.

B E C K · « **Reply #137 on:** Oct 05, 2016, 01:52:59 AM »

Nonsense, Joe onii-chan always has something important to say.

B E C K · « **Reply #138 on:** Oct 14, 2016, 01:53:29 AM »

JK Rowling Says ‘Fantastic Beasts’ Franchise Will Span 5 Movies. Even though it was going to be a trilogy. Watch, they're gonna do five films with, like, barely one film's worth of material. She's just trying to outdo the Hobbit at this point.

joe · « **Reply #139 on:** Oct 14, 2016, 02:01:25 AM »

Maaaaaan. Fuck that shit. If that's actually her line of thinking, she forgot the part where a lot of Rings fans consider the Hobbit movies to be irredeemable trash.

I hope Beasts eats shit at the box office. Seriously, I know it's petty, but I want it to fail so hard now. God damn it.

B E C K · « **Reply #140 on:** Oct 14, 2016, 11:35:19 PM »

No, no I'm with you. This needs to implode, otherwise they're gonna milk this shit forever. Sadly, I think it'll do gonzo numbers, but I really want it to bomb along with Dr. Strange and Rogue One.

joe · « **Reply #141 on:** Oct 15, 2016, 07:32:44 PM »

I don't want Dr. Strange to fail, but I fear its appeal is nebulous at best. Now watch me be proven wrong.

Rogue One is just... every time I see it I'm struck by the dearth of aliens. It's like whoever made it was afraid that people wouldn't take their super serious movie seriously if they included any makeup or rubber suits.

B E C K · « **Reply #142 on:** Oct 15, 2016, 08:11:05 PM »

I want it to fail but I will never underestimate the will of (Marvel Fandom + Cumberbitches).

Re: Rogue One: Yeah, that makes me mad. We could've had cool alien protags and bad guys. They could've given Donnie Yen or whoever a Salacious Crumb-type sidekick. Or a dude made out of a fuckin' goo. Or a spider woman or something. It's just, gosh, even the humans they use are very, very samey. Broody expressions, dark outfits, and interchangeable with any other scifi thing. Where's their Ruby Rhod? Where's their Captain Jack Harkness? Where's their Spock (referencing Nimoy) or their Worf? Like, the very least they could've done is make some weird humans and they couldn't even do that much. What about a humanoid robot or droid? Something like the Predator? "Well, uh, Donnie Yen's Asian and blind." Ugh. They couldn't even go with Star Trek aliens a.k.a. just-add-a-ridge/earring/etc. They went full Firefly or sum shit.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #143 on:** Oct 15, 2016, 11:09:07 PM »

When Star Trek has St*r WarzzZZ beat for diversity (in all senses of the word), you know they're missing a lot of the point. This is science fiction, not the hipster coffee shop at the college.

joe · « **Reply #144 on:** Nov 04, 2016, 12:58:33 AM »

Referring to St*r WarzzZZ as SF has always felt off to me. Yeah, it's certainly full of all kinds of techie shit, but it isn't ever about that stuff, it's just window dressing.

Anyway, there was a Rogue One trailer ahead of Doctor Pepper, and I spotted a couple aliens in it. I guess I'm mollified for now.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #145 on:** Nov 05, 2016, 12:44:44 AM »

It may be more along the lines of an old serial western, but it's still scifi that's talking about Galactic Empires with space planes carrying firepower of varying magnitudes, funky jive-talking aliens that came straight from the Red Lobster menu, semi-relatable robots who hold the keys to life and happiness, and ancient orders of monks tussling with opposing space monks with laser swords and zen energy fields and nameless hordes of laser-toting clones flying around on hoverbikes and banthas and shit.

B E C K · « **Reply #146 on:** Nov 05, 2016, 06:58:20 AM »

Star Wars always felt more like Fantasy than Sci-fi to me. I liked it when it felt that way. When they started trying to explain the force, I think a piece of me died inside.

joe · « **Reply #147 on:** Nov 05, 2016, 08:56:39 AM »

Quote from: B E C K on Nov 05, 2016, 06:58:20 AM

Star Wars always felt more like Fantasy than Sci-fi to me. I liked it when it felt that way. When they started trying to explain the force, I think a piece of me died inside.

Sounds like you may be suffering from a low midi-chlorian count. Might want to consult a physician.

B E C K · « **Reply #148 on:** Nov 06, 2016, 01:24:26 AM »

I only get a period every other month now but my skill with a light saber is unparalleled.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #149 on:** Nov 07, 2016, 10:13:43 PM »

What's worse: the hokey sci-fi explanations, or the hokey religious ones? Sometimes a binary star sunset is just a binary star sunset. It's not proof of invincible wee beasties or invisible intergalactic Brahman.