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Author Topic: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?  (Read 3818 times)

B E C K

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How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« on: Oct 27, 2010, 04:22:29 PM »


HOW?  Is it too much for vampires to actually be DEAD?  To not get pregnant or sparkle or have acne or boners for that matter?  It's a FUCKING VAMPIRE!  I don't care if you got in without being invited or garlic has no effect, but what the hell does "being dead" mean anymore if you can still reproduce and get zits!?  HUH?  HUH!!?   >:(

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #1 on: Oct 27, 2010, 05:15:59 PM »
Dude, what?

If vampires couldn't get boners they would all just stake themselves.

Seriously, what's the point of immortality if you're incapable of an erection?

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #2 on: Oct 27, 2010, 06:07:15 PM »
Vampires have almost always been about sexuality, so removing the boners does not make sense for the myth (but for the science, perhaps). Plus what other joe said.
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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #3 on: Oct 27, 2010, 07:42:52 PM »
Are you reading Twilight, Nuri? please tell us you arent

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #4 on: Oct 27, 2010, 08:52:11 PM »
This thread is fucked up.
I said its hot outside let me go swimming in your eyes;
We been running for awhile. Why don't you lay dow, I'll make you smile.
I could never ask for nothing better than this;
It's just tequila and the beach, it's quite salty when we kiss.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #5 on: Oct 27, 2010, 09:36:31 PM »
Yeah, fucked up WITH VAMPIRE BONERS.

I thought maybe she had just watched Let Me In or Let the Right One In or whatever.

B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #6 on: Oct 27, 2010, 09:56:52 PM »
No, I saw the Swedish one a while back and won't be seeing the American one.

This thread's because Mer-Mer's watching this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moonlight_(TV_series)

Vampires have almost always been about sexuality, so removing the boners does not make sense for the myth (but for the science, perhaps). Plus what other joe said.

How does removing boners not make sense for the myth?  Vampires can seduce a victim just fine without it.

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #7 on: Oct 27, 2010, 10:00:14 PM »
THOSE ARE NOT THE SAME THING
Get a little closer let it fold
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B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #8 on: Oct 27, 2010, 10:07:43 PM »
"THOSE" what?

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #9 on: Oct 27, 2010, 10:25:03 PM »
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

jonhammstein

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #10 on: Oct 27, 2010, 10:32:56 PM »
Ugh. Jesus.

Let Me In is based on Let the Right One In, right?

...

Son of a bitch!

Are you the one who went on and on about how Constantine wasn't based on Hellblazer?

That was you, wasn't it?

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #11 on: Oct 28, 2010, 12:31:03 AM »
Quote
How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?

The same way they get drunk: by biting drunks. Duh. Bite a pizza-faced teen, get pimply. And you know it's GOT to be hell on those pale, undead faces.
Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #12 on: Oct 28, 2010, 01:41:53 AM »
"THOSE" what?

Let Me In or Let the Right One In

So what's you're point?  They might as well BE the same.  Pun totally unintended, but the American remake can bite me along with the remake of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #13 on: Oct 28, 2010, 01:42:45 AM »
The drinking of blood is a metaphor for sex. So in a way it replaces sex for the Vampire. They lose their feelings down there, but gain something better in the drinking of blood.

B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #14 on: Oct 28, 2010, 01:56:27 AM »
^ Yes, dat.  A functioning penis on a vampire is just so many kinds of unnecessary.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #15 on: Oct 28, 2010, 02:16:50 AM »
And that's the romantic versions of books and movies. Most vampires of folklore were little more then walking corpses, sex wasn't something they really did. They were dead.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #16 on: Oct 28, 2010, 03:22:56 AM »
They could dickstab them and drain their blood with it, but would anyone pay to see that?

I don't think so.
Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #17 on: Oct 28, 2010, 03:41:25 AM »
"THOSE" what?

Let Me In or Let the Right One In

Did you see the american version of Let the Right one in is coming out? why ? WHY??????

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #18 on: Oct 28, 2010, 01:28:55 PM »
That is what Let Me In is, Faye.
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #19 on: Oct 28, 2010, 05:45:03 PM »
They could dickstab them and drain their blood with it, but would anyone pay to see that?

I don't think so.

Are you SUUUUUUUUUUUURE?   ;D


That is what Let Me In is, Faye.

BTW, I'm so glad it tanked: http://boxofficemojo.com/movies/?id=lettherightonein09.htm 

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #20 on: Oct 28, 2010, 08:10:54 PM »
That is what Let Me In is, Faye.
wat

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #21 on: Oct 28, 2010, 08:23:07 PM »
Yes. They changed the name.
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
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Rama

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #22 on: Oct 28, 2010, 11:45:02 PM »
They could dickstab them and drain their blood with it, but would anyone pay to see that?

I don't think so.

They could use their dick to soak up period blood, but that seems really ineffective way of doing it.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #23 on: Oct 29, 2010, 07:17:04 AM »
Yes. They changed the name.
Oh.....fuck everything. At least they didn't put one of Will Smith's children as the goddamn vampire. damnit.

B E C K

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #24 on: Oct 29, 2010, 04:04:52 PM »
They should've.  It would've made it a worse movie, but it probably wouldn't have tanked since daddy could just go buy up tickets.

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #25 on: Oct 29, 2010, 05:16:07 PM »
Yes. They changed the name.
Oh.....fuck everything.

Everything you say?
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

Faye Valentine

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #26 on: Oct 29, 2010, 08:26:21 PM »
everything with will smith or anyone fromh is family in it

Fiero

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #27 on: Oct 29, 2010, 08:46:27 PM »
Ahhh.... okay...
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #28 on: Oct 29, 2010, 11:21:00 PM »
They could dickstab them and drain their blood with it, but would anyone pay to see that?

I don't think so.

They could use their dick to soak up period blood, but that seems really ineffective way of doing it.

No, I'm talking about literally stabbing people with them. Imagine crossing Jack the Ripper with Lex the Impaler and Dracula.
Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

Rama

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Re: How the FUCK do vampires get ACNE?
« Reply #29 on: Oct 30, 2010, 01:29:44 AM »
Would they be sharpening their dicks in some way, or just ramming really hard.