Freezing over

[The D]

60 above - Floridians wear coats, gloves, and wooly hats. Michigan people sunbathe.

50 above - New Yorkers try to turn on the heat. Michigan people plant gardens.

40 above - Italian cars won`t start. Michigan people drive with the windows down.

32 above - Distilled water freezes. Lake Michigan`s water gets thicker.

20 above - Californians shiver uncontrollably. Michigan people have the last cookout before it gets cold.

15 above - New York landlords finally turn up the heat. Michigan people throw on a sweatshirt.

0 degrees - Californians fly away to Mexico. Michigan people throw on a light jacket over the sweatshirt.

20 below - People in Miami cease to exist. Michigan people get out their winter coats.

40 below - Hollywood disintegrates. Michigan Girl Scouts begin selling cookies door to door.

60 below - Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica. Michigan`s Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

80 below - Mount St. Helens freezes. Michigan people rent some videos.

100 below - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Michigan people get frustrated when they can`t thaw the keg.

297 below - Microbial life survives on dairy products. Michigan cows complain of farmers with cold hands.

460 below - ALL atomic motion stops. Michigan people start saying. . ."Cold `nuff for ya??"

500 below - Hell freezes over. The Detroit Lions win the Super Bowl.



*pulls out a grill and charcoal*  So, cold 'nuff for ya?

[The D]

I just noticed that said that Polar Bears evacuate Antarctica. who the fuck wrote that?

[Derrick]

I wear T-Shirts when people in Florida have coats and gloves.

[Faye Valentine]

Fuck this cold. I've been living in Philly for 7 years already and I can't stand the damn cold! i want to move somewhewhere where its warm all the time!i KNEW i should have transferred to University of Hawaii

[Derrick]

Fuck this cold. I've been living in Philly for 7 years already and I can't stand the damn cold! i want to move somewhewhere where its warm all the time!i KNEW i should have transferred to University of Hawaii

They have serious academic programs in my research. If it wasn't for the Meth, I'd consider going there for my doctorate.

[IDE]

Because you can't resist the call of that sweet sweet ice?

[Firebird1]

Well, I had my first casaluty of the cold.  The Winter killed my Car Battery!  Now it lies in a pool of Battery acid in the Firestone garage.

[Derrick]

Because you can't resist the call of that sweet sweet ice?

I don't want the Dog getting me.

Wait, I'm not black. Nevermind.

[ChelseySuzie]

You're a white male.  You can't get arrested for drugs.

[Derrick]

[B E C K]

It's in the 40's here.  Too cold for me.    Some chick was wearing a mini skirt today.  With no tights or hose or anything.  Not even a pair of warm boots.  Meanwhile, I had two layered shirts, a hoodie, and a scarf.

[ChelseySuzie]

Was she fat?  Because in Iowa, really fat people walk around outside in January with shorts and a t-shirt while I'm shaking like a Chihuahua.

To describe the weather here: It's fucking cold!  The kind of cold where you want to be home before sundown and not because mutant vampires will attack you.

[Rama]

I found it really funny that it was 35 near the Artic circle, but 18 in Chicago last week.

[Sam]

Yesterday morning the temperature when I went to work was -9 F.  Around -35 F wind chill.

[B E C K]

Was she fat?  Because in Iowa, really fat people walk around outside in January with shorts and a t-shirt while I'm shaking like a Chihuahua.

To describe the weather here: It's fucking cold!  The kind of cold where you want to be home before sundown and not because mutant vampires will attack you.

Her thighs were on the meaty side, but I wouldn't have called her fat.

[Faye Valentine]

Yesterday morning the temperature when I went to work was -9 F.  Around -35 F wind chill.

I was wondering about when you were going to chime in with that info!

I kind of "hibernate" during winter. I hardly ever go out, i prefer to be in my nice warm bed

[The D]

Is it unusual when I step outside and find 26 degrees to be "warm"? Maybe I'm turning Canadian.