Author Topic: Why can't I stop reading this? (Read 14603 times)

The D · « **on:** Nov 19, 2007, 11:15:25 PM »

Meg's avatar reminded me of this, but I checked out this book...the 15th.. and today's the 20th... so 5 days ago, Thursday, so I've been reading Order of the Phoenix for 4 days and I've gotten over halfway through the damn book. Everytime I try to put it down I want to read it more. I think Rowling jinxed the damn books.

This is my running commentary of the book but being halfway through I'll have to go back and skim to miss the other parts I wanted to comment about, some of which may be explained later in the book. But I cheer every time Harry shows some balls and uppercuts Malfoy. And I would have bitchslapped that Umbridge bitch a long time ago for making Harry do those hand-carving sentences bullshit.

I also wonder if Rowling has ever raised teenagers before... I assume when she wrote these her kids were still under 12 because often these kids don't seem too much like real teenagers. They should be running around acting all hormonal and agressive and cocky and horny and fucking and getting preggers and doing drugs and drinking alcohol and shit.

B E C K · « **Reply #1 on:** Nov 19, 2007, 11:51:28 PM »

Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.

I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.

The D · « **Reply #2 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 12:25:52 AM »

Quote from: B E C K on Nov 19, 2007, 11:51:28 PM

Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.

I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.

Every teenager at the high school I went to was like that. I think half the girls there were preggers. And there were plenty of potheads. Harry Ron and the twins should be getting stoned on whatever wizards use to get high. At least they drink something like alcohol but I have a feeling Butterbeer is non-alcoholic, even considering they're in Britain.

Oh, and the first commentary about this book... why the hell did Rowling name a black man "Shaklebolt"?

B E C K · « **Reply #3 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 01:00:10 AM »

Quote from: Dangerous D on Nov 20, 2007, 12:25:52 AM

Quote from: B E C K on Nov 19, 2007, 11:51:28 PM
Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.

I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.

Every teenager at the high school I went to was like that.

I wasn't like that. Besides, the whole idea of Harry Potter is so you don't have to read about disgusting kids like that. If I wanted to deal with that shit, I'd go back to work at Long John Silver's. Or watch Maury Povich. Or ask my aunts how my cousins are doing.

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #4 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 08:21:53 AM »

It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.

Sam · « **Reply #5 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 10:56:47 AM »

I can't stand the term "preggers"

B E C K · « **Reply #6 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 12:04:23 PM »

Quote from: Wickedly Yours E on Nov 20, 2007, 08:21:53 AM

It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.

It kinda seemed that way to me, too. I think that's why I started skimming. I only read the last one because it was, like, the end to everything.

IDE · « **Reply #7 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 01:33:14 PM »

Quote from: Sam on Nov 20, 2007, 10:56:47 AM

I can't stand the term "preggers"

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that way. Whenever I read/hear that word I picture the person who used it getting an instant southern accent accompanied by their eye balls looking off in two different directions and a cartoon spring "BOING" sound is heard in the background.

Sam · « **Reply #8 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 04:15:01 PM »

To me it makes pregnancy sound like it's a game. To use your same example, the person talking would have about a half-dozen kids running around, with no more than 5 years between the oldest and youngest.

IDE · « **Reply #9 on:** Nov 20, 2007, 06:31:33 PM »

Quote from: Sam on Nov 20, 2007, 04:15:01 PM

To me it makes pregnancy sound like it's a game.

And theres some sort of preg-o-matic bubble involved.

Rama · « **Reply #10 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 01:00:32 AM »

Whack-A-Fetus.

Put one of those next to the DDR machine and you'll be sitting pretty in no time.

B E C K · « **Reply #11 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 01:39:27 PM »

I've never got that feeling off the word "preggers". Of course, I've only used it and seen it used on the Internet. I've never heard anyone actually say "preggers" in a rl context.

IDE · « **Reply #12 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 02:16:50 PM »

I dated a girl that said it offline.

Derrick · « **Reply #13 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 06:42:25 PM »

Dated, or banged her after she mysteriously swallowed an aquadot and then the resulting paternal suit?

IDE · « **Reply #14 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 06:59:07 PM »

wtf is an aquadot?

Derrick · « **Reply #15 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 07:19:45 PM »

Plausible deniability won't work here.

IDE · « **Reply #16 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 07:37:49 PM »

For some reason the first thing that popped into my head was birth control pill, but that made no sense, then my superior powers of deduction kicked in and I now believe aquadot is some sort of new age date rape drug that I'm unfamiliar with.

amirite?

Derrick · « **Reply #17 on:** Nov 21, 2007, 10:06:59 PM »

Children's toy that is made in China. When you swallow it, it turns into the daterape drug.

The D · « **Reply #18 on:** Nov 24, 2007, 12:07:39 PM »

Harry must have no testicles. How else can he screw up his dates with Cho so fucking badly?! He's so damn retarded he can't fathom why Cho gets jealous when he even mentions Hermione... duh, when you spend more time with another girl BESIDES your GF, she's gonna get mad!

And when in this novel is Harry not pissed about the tiniest little things? It's like he's perpetually angry.

The D · « **Reply #19 on:** Nov 28, 2007, 12:11:54 PM »

Quote from: Wickedly Yours E on Nov 20, 2007, 08:21:53 AM

It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.

I don't think so. I think these books are actually better because they're less childish and more dark, although I'm starting to get tired of Harry being pissed off all the time and even biting the heads off of his closest friends. Although I guess they could justify it by saying he's absorbing the rage from Voldie and becoming more like him, but Voldie never loses his temper, he's very cool and collected and calm. And I still think they don't act enough like teenagers.

I have a great respect for Dumbledore now. Taking on a bunch of wizards and kicking all their asses at once? I mean, Shacklebolt (ha ha!) might have helped him, but I think he just stood there and did nothing.

I have an even greater respect for Hagrid. I can just envision IDE being like a well-toned Hagrid, busting out of his cottage, spells bouncing off his chest like they're nothing, and him tossing wizards 50 feet away with a swipe of his hand. For Hagrid to kick the crap out of all those wizards and take off running, that's just wicked.

And poor Snape. Harry needs to sit down and talk with that guy, let him know he feel sorry for him and he's not like his father. But Harry's too prepetually angry at everyone and sorry for his self to actually care about other's feelings.

IDE · « **Reply #20 on:** Nov 28, 2007, 07:22:58 PM »

Voldemort gets pissed all the time in the last book.

The D · « **Reply #21 on:** Nov 28, 2007, 11:09:45 PM »

That's because those meddling kids keep on interfering with his plans. And their dog too.

B E C K · « **Reply #22 on:** Nov 29, 2007, 12:07:52 PM »

Poor Snape? But Snape was a cranky-ass that doesn't know the meaning of "get over it!" Screw Snape.

The D · « **Reply #23 on:** Nov 30, 2007, 12:54:32 PM »

Neither does Harry, apparently.

The D · « **Reply #24 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 11:53:36 AM »

I finished yesterday and started on Half Blood Prince.

Quote from: B E C K on Nov 29, 2007, 12:07:52 PM

Poor Snape? But Snape was a cranky-ass that doesn't know the meaning of "get over it!" Screw Snape.

I meant Poor Snape on how he was treated as a kid. Yea, he needs to get over it. And so does Harry. Blaming everyone for Sirius's death?

And how the hell do they know Sirius is dead? They don't even bother explaining what the hell that arch with the veil is. He falls through an arch and through a veil and he's dead? Why? Explain why he's dead? I mean, the arch could be a portal to another dimension for all we know, or a time travelling portal. Did it lead to the dinosaur age and he got eaten? He should have died in an epic way, like killing two death eaters at once while he dies. Not falling through a fucking arch!

IDE · « **Reply #25 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 12:00:10 PM »

It came off as a portal into death for me. It was all ghostly and shit. I don't know what you use such a portal for but I imagine you could call spirits to the veil and perhaps bottle nether from the underworld for use as magical components.

B E C K · « **Reply #26 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 12:04:40 PM »

Quote

I meant Poor Snape on how he was treated as a kid. Yea, he needs to get over it. And so does Harry. Blaming everyone for Sirius's death?

Harry's still a kid and Sirius recently died. Snape's an adult (arguably) and his shit happened ages ago, and he persists in being a grudge-holding whiner.

IDE · « **Reply #27 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 12:07:09 PM »

I think snape is more pissed about losing the love of his life to the man who tormented him from K-12 than just the fact that james pwned him regularly.

The D · « **Reply #28 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 12:18:13 PM »

I noticed the chapter where Sirius dies is called "Beyond the Veil" which is often an expression used for the afterlife. And Dumbledore refers to the room as the "Death Chamber" so I guess the archway is a portal to the afterlife. But Rowling does such a crappy job of explaining what the portal is that I still think it's a shitty way for Sirius to go.

Also, I remember that Luna blew up Pluto in the planet room. Apparently she could see the future and knew the planet would be removed from the list.

IDE · « **Reply #29 on:** Dec 04, 2007, 12:29:56 PM »

I like the way she did it. I don't need a writer to draw a schematic of the death portal and list all of it's uses. But then I like mysterious things.