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Author Topic: uno dos tres  (Read 42671 times)

IDE

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #330 on: Aug 18, 2013, 03:13:51 AM »
I fingered an Armenian chick tonight.  She smelled like day old kebab and wouldn't let me hit it on the first date.  Her tits are ginormous though.  I didn't even ask what size but I'll post a pic later.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #331 on: Aug 18, 2013, 11:22:53 PM »
Anyways, I don't know about you but the only thing faye knows about real life is how to get knocked up by a powet ranger.

Well who did you expect to knock her up?  Zordon?  Rita Repulsa?  

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #332 on: Aug 18, 2013, 11:54:38 PM »
Lord Zedd of course.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #333 on: Aug 19, 2013, 01:43:02 AM »
Anyways, I don't know about you but the only thing faye knows about real life is how to get knocked up by a powet ranger.

Well who did you expect to knock her up?  Zordon?  Rita Repulsa?  
wtf he said that?

A powet ranger? Bitch you better know that he's Jiban

Also, found you on fb

<img src="http://i.imgur.com/bAglHHR.png"
« Last Edit: Aug 19, 2013, 01:54:36 AM by Faye Valentine »

IDE

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #334 on: Aug 19, 2013, 03:35:37 AM »
Yes, he said that.

Is that fb thing a reference to something?

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #335 on: Aug 19, 2013, 09:50:42 AM »
What's wrong with fucking a Powet Ranger?  <3 Amy Jo Johnson.

IDE

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #336 on: Aug 20, 2013, 04:34:30 PM »
She's still hot...

Never saw flashpoint, maybe I'll google what it was about later.


I just broke up with the 29 year old therapist because of some shit that gave me flashbacks to my last singular relationship.  She's begging me to talk to her and I'm of many minds about whether I should or not.  The 21 yr old that left me didn't give me any closure, should I now pay that wickedness forward or should I rise above it?  If this was a movie you'd choose rise above it, and I think that's going to happen but I feel the pull of the other ley line as well.  The one where I don't say anything and let her fade out of my existence as was done to me.  See I'm not just banging these girls.  I care about all of them.  I have different personalities with a lot of them, like the many incarnations of godhead I lavish my presence upon them.  Or maybe I'm bat shit crazy, we're all just tiny specks in an ever expanding universe.  Who cares if you like Tom Hiddleston or not, if your debit card is scratched and won't run through a scanner, or whether I ever talk to this emotionally fractured red head again.  Nothing matters, nothing at all...now throw yourself from the top of a building in entropic despair, or don't.  It won't matter either way...


is one way to look at it.


OR....


YOU CAN JUST KEEP ON FUCKING! AND FUCKING! AND FUCKING! AND FUCKING! THRUSTING AND SLAMMING YOUR PENIS INTO EVERY LAST LIVING THING! IN THE HOPES THAT ONE DAY SOMEWHERE, BILLIONS OF YEARS FROM NOW, SOME BEING WROUGHT FROM YOUR SPLOOGE EONS AGO WILL FINALLY RISE UP THE EVOLUTIONARY LADDER HIGH ENOUGH TO PULL BACK THE VEIL OF INFINITE MYSTERY, THROW DOWN THE POWERS THAT BE AND RULE THE MULTIVERSE WITH AN IRON DONG!

(Actually the dong will probably be made of some unknown material infinitely harder than iron but you know what I'm saying.)

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #337 on: Aug 20, 2013, 05:25:51 PM »
Being amongst living things that doesn't want your penis in it, I think you should call her, even if it's to tell her you're still only interested in channelling your inner Bacchus.
Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #338 on: Aug 21, 2013, 03:10:39 AM »
You're in the clear.  My penis only goes in living female things...and some inanimate female things, like pool pumps.

Rama

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #339 on: Aug 21, 2013, 11:27:31 PM »
You can have sex with a pool pump? I did not know that.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #340 on: Aug 22, 2013, 03:56:02 AM »
There is something to learn from everyone you encounter in this fleeting existence.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #341 on: Aug 22, 2013, 11:09:17 AM »
That was your reaction to my obama comment?

I wasn't even...ah well ok whatever.

Anyways, I don't know about you but the only thing faye knows about real life is how to get knocked up by a powet ranger.



That guy's a Power Ranger?

I don't see how that's a problem.
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #342 on: Aug 26, 2013, 05:28:05 PM »
I don't remember where we were talking about Miley twerking, so I'm posting this here. Seems appropriate.

http://imgur.com/gallery/GyiFtjJ
Get a little closer let it fold
Cut open my sternum and pull
My little ribs around you

IDE

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #343 on: Aug 27, 2013, 05:23:04 AM »
I'll allow it! 

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #344 on: Aug 30, 2013, 08:29:36 PM »
I don't remember where we were talking about Miley twerking, so I'm posting this here. Seems appropriate.

http://imgur.com/gallery/GyiFtjJ

Would have been perfect if during that face close-up, her tongue popped out a couple of times.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #345 on: Apr 08, 2014, 02:02:46 AM »
I ended up nailing tjat armenian chick, now I'm after a girl fro sri lanka.  I might have to rename my dick Carmen Slamdiego.

But all of this has been made irrelevant by an app called tinder.  It catalogs girls that are interested in you so that you dont have to make a list anymore.

Farewell list of bitches that I need to bang you've been supplanted by technology.  What an age we live in.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #346 on: Apr 12, 2014, 09:53:16 PM »
I swear I thought Tinder was a gay thing until last month.  Thanks, Kathy Griffin.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #347 on: Apr 23, 2014, 05:32:54 AM »
I don't remember making that last post :D

Carmen Slamdiego!  I'm stealing that...from me!

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #348 on: Apr 25, 2014, 01:02:25 AM »
I've heard a lot of your material is actually stolen from yourself.

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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #349 on: Apr 29, 2014, 03:46:08 AM »
I fucked a really cute girl in the bathroom at my friend's birthday party! No digital age apps involved, just good old fashioned "Hey there's a cat in there!". There really was a cat in the bathroom (that's where they hide it during parties).   Once inside the bathroom we talked for awhile and I ended up throwing her on the sink and pulling her panties to the side.


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Re: uno dos tres
« Reply #350 on: Apr 29, 2014, 05:24:11 PM »
*snap*

Just like that.
Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.