The Sphere
General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: Derrick on Apr 01, 2010, 05:23:07 AM
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Right now I am typing with one arm. I was out driving during the record rains and my car skidded along the highway. It flipped and apparently my left side became crushed between the door and seat. They tried to save it, but I just lost it below the elbow. I don't know what to do now.
There is no emotion, there is peace.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
There is no passion, there is serenity.
There is no death, there is the Force.
:tom:
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Well, I couldn't resist my bishonen any longer and now I'm expecting. You can adopt him/her as your personal helper. :)
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Right now I am also typing with one arm....
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:o :raiseeyebrow:
*gets Rama a subscription to Amputee Sleazes*
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Oh yeah...oil that stump. Alllllllllllllllllright.
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Right now I am also typing with one arm....
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!! A horrible image came to mind.
Did you guys hear about the new Starbucks' sizes, Plenta and Mirca. Hahahaha!!
http://www.starbucks.com/blog/10113/starbucks-listens-to-customer-request-for-more-sizes.aspx
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I often type with one hand, but that's only because I am masturbating.
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Right now I am also typing with one arm....
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!! A horrible image came to mind.
Did you guys hear about the new Starbucks' sizes, Plenta and Mirca. Hahahaha!!
http://www.starbucks.com/blog/10113/starbucks-listens-to-customer-request-for-more-sizes.aspx
They are cancelling that program tomorrow.
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Right now I am also typing with one arm....
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!! A horrible image came to mind.
What she failed to say is that now she is also typing with one hand. You are so kinky girl.
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Women have wireless devices that render hands a liability.
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You can get those for dudes, too.
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And how is that working out for ya?
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THEY MAKE THOSE! FUCK! Good thing sexshops are usually open 24-hours. This better not be an April Fool's Joke.
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The little devil on my shoulder told me to tell the debters calling in over at work that they owed several thousand dollars to their city/county and midway through their meltdown cheerily pipe in "April Fools!" Then I thought better of it.
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Yeah, I think that would be illegal.
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Oh well, it was the thought that counts.
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Soon, that too will be illegal. Enjoy.
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Also, masturbation will be illegal.
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Like they can catch me. I haven't paid taxes for 3 years, I won't be caught floggin' the dolphin.
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Taxes will also be illegal. All of your money will go straight to the government, so taxes will not be repealed.
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Right now I am also typing with one arm....
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!! A horrible image came to mind.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought of the same thing lol
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That he had lost an arm?
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Sorry if you had that misconception. What I was going for was that I was touching myself.
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What I got was the thought of Derrick with one arm inspired the touching.
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Oh it did.
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Stump sex is always awesome.
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Better than socket sex? Murry the Evil Skull used to swear by it.
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That was a night I was not proud of...but he was just giving me that "come hither" look.
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I've been enjoying aural sex recently.
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I've been typing with one hand at work and I want to tell the people calling in to slow down giving me their info and stuff because I'm typing with one hand, but I already know how their dirty minds work. BTW I use the other hand to press the ear piece against my ear because some of these people are hard to hear.
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Turn up the volume.
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It's already all the way up.
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Break it open and reprogram it to be louder like they did that one time on the IT Crowd, oh wait that was the vibrate, nevermind.
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I like when it vibrates. :tom:
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Bet it could go up to eleven....
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My iphone microphone/ear plugs stopped working a week after I got it. Fuckers.
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Even if I could somehow jack up the volume, I ain't going deaf on account of these people.
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Bet it could go up to eleven....
Oh...Bernie beat me too it.
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My iphone microphone/ear plugs stopped working a week after I got it. Fuckers.
I'm so pissed that bluetooth headsets don't work with the iPhone. Apple can suck my balls.
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Bluetooth headphones do work with the iPhone, just not all of them.
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Guess which one I bought?
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The one that does not work. I knew long before I even thought of buying an iPhone that they had this sort of problem. It should not be surprising, this is Apple we are talking about.
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Indeed, fuck an apple.
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But the iPhone is trendy and everyone has one. It must be the best right? That's why you guys are going to buy the iPad.
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I am not likely to buy an iPad unless I find a niche in my computer usage it can fill, which it will not. My iPhone, however, is the love of my life and I never want to ever be without it again. I CAN NOT WAIT FOR OS 4. Holy shit, MULTITASKING. Sort of.
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It's OK. You won't need an iPad till you start to get your iPeriod.
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I think if I were in that sort of situation I would prefer an iTampon.
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You would, you whore.
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LANGUAGE!
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WORDS!
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TACOS!
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"I'M FULL!"
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Every man I know is going to get an iPad when the next one comes out. The first one always sucks.
And I love my iphone too, im completely dependant on that goddamn thing.
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I'm happy enough with the iPhone and my laptop that I have no desire for something in the middle. I'll wait for the iGlasses.