Author Topic: Order of teh Phoenixeseses (Read 11312 times)

B E C K · « **on:** Jul 11, 2007, 11:36:55 PM »

A decent movie but probably my least favorite HP movie. I think it'll take more viewings to decide whether I rank it before, after, or equal to Azkaban, which was previously my least favorite. Critic Larry Ratliff gave it three jalepenos. I concur. Stuffs:

Sirius's death is just as lame as in the book.
The final battle scene suffered from cropped-fightitis, where the director thinks getting up close to the battle makes it betttAH!!111klwfl Instead, it was confusing Daredevilism.
Merla thought the music left much to be desired, but I didn't notice.
The scene with the giant and the earlier scene with those weird horse-things felt like obvious green-screen acting. I know that's what it was, but it doesn't have to *look* that way. Interaction felt ingenuine and minimal.
Luna Lovegood is great! So was Tonks, however briefly she may have been there.
Bellatrix left much to be desired. It's like she just pops in to kill Sirius.
I felt so bad for Sybil. Emma Thompson and Maggie Smith were great considering the little time they were given.
Cho's hawt.
I've had three films now to get used to Michael Gambon as Dumbledore and it ain't happening. I can't wait for him to die. He's a mean Dumbledore. He's like the grandpa you want to see because he gives you great presents but you don't want to visit with him.
Snape has had the same hair for a good twenty years. Ewwww.
Everytime they showed Voldemort, I kept picturing him banging that flight attendant.
That dress they put Fiona Shaw in was hilarious. And the guy that plays Harry's uncle appears to have gotten fatter.
I wouldn't have minded a three hour movie to fit in more stuff. I don't mean SPEW or anything boring like that, the movie just felt rushed and incomplete at times. It could've used some more fleshing out here and there.

B E C K · « **Reply #1 on:** Jul 11, 2007, 11:42:34 PM »

In regards to what they leave out from the book other than SPEW, that whole Black family tree thing wasn't explained a bit other than Mommy burns some of teh faces. Neither was that veiled arch-thingy spoken of. Sirius just falls through it and if you hadn't really read the book, you just think "what the fuck is that thing".

And Sirius winking at Harry was cute the first time. When he does it a second time, it creeps into Dougville.

The D · « **Reply #2 on:** Jul 12, 2007, 02:31:25 PM »

Quote from: B E C K on Jul 11, 2007, 11:36:55 PM

The final battle scene suffered from cropped-fightitis, where the director thinks getting up close to the battle makes it betttAH!!111klwfl Instead, it was confusing Daredevilism.

Almost every movie nowadays suffers from bad fight scene editing, either with jittery, shakey camera, the view changing every second, epilepsy-inducing strobe lights, and other shit. Michael Bay's famous for this, including the Transformer's movie.

Quote from: B E C K

I've had three films now to get used to Michael Gambon as Dumbledore and it ain't happening. I can't wait for him to die. He's a mean Dumbledore. He's like the grandpa you want to see because he gives you great presents but you don't want to visit with him.

The new dumbledore feels wrong. His beard seems smaller in this one. I wouldn't say he's meaner from what I've seen of the other movies, he's just too... different.

Quote from: B E C K

I wouldn't have minded a three hour movie to fit in more stuff. I don't mean SPEW or anything boring like that, the movie just felt rushed and incomplete at times. It could've used some more fleshing out here and there.

If spew wasn't in goblet, I don't see it popping up in any of the movies. Unless it affects the plot in some major way. I don't know if Winky was important in the plot except the part where she finds Harry's wand.

The title could also be read "order of the peniseseses"

Rama · « **Reply #3 on:** Jul 13, 2007, 01:20:58 AM »

I plan on seeing this, this weekend.

And I wish they would have picked someone younger and then made them look older for Dumbledore. Instead of going with people like Rich Harris or Michael Gambon where you are just wondering if they'll live long enough to be in the next movie.

IDE · « **Reply #4 on:** Jul 13, 2007, 08:27:58 AM »

I like the new dumbledore.

But I don't like this pussy assed fight scene crap that plagues both this and the transformers. It's like they don't know how to make it epic enough so they jiggle the camera around and expect you to be all "WHOOOAAA! WHATS GOIN ON?! EPIC BATTLE!!!"

If need be I can be consulted on what constitutes an epic battle and then they can film it with a steady cam and everyone will be blown away by the action instead of bamboozled by camera work...it's the myspace angles of fight scenes says I, and it must be stopped...no matter what the cost.

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #5 on:** Jul 13, 2007, 11:50:13 AM »

My vote for Dumbledore was Peter O'Toole. Not any younger, but I think he fit the original physical concept of the character better and as far as I know, he's in great health - 3 or 4 projects either filming or in production at the moment. It doesn't surprise me when Gambon Dumbledore acts like a prick because the actor's Irish thug aura is so obvious. He may be the sweetest man alive, but sorry; he's scary-looking.

B E C K · « **Reply #6 on:** Jul 13, 2007, 01:34:24 PM »

I didn't even consider that! It's the feckin' Oirish thug blood, it is! He'd break our necks for a Guiness!

Quote from: IDE on Jul 13, 2007, 08:27:58 AM

But I don't like this pussy assed fight scene crap that plagues both this and the transformers. It's like they don't know how to make it epic enough so they jiggle the camera around and expect you to be all "WHOOOAAA! WHATS GOIN ON?! EPIC BATTLE!!!"

If need be I can be consulted on what constitutes an epic battle and then they can film it with a steady cam and everyone will be blown away by the action instead of bamboozled by camera work...it's the myspace angles of fight scenes says I, and it must be stopped...no matter what the cost.

OMG, it pisses me off. You know, I'd expect it from a movie where the franchise is trying to prove itself or there's a limited budget. There is NO excuse for it happening in a Harry Potter movie, where they know it's gonna make teh millions. At one point, we see a Death Eater on the floor and a kid with the wand, some other kid going "got 'em" or something like that. No, you didn't! SHOW. US.

It could've been a four star film if they had delivered a spectacular fight. Pfft.

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #7 on:** Jul 16, 2007, 01:51:56 PM »

My cousin brought up another better-than-Gambon candidate - Christopher Plummer. Hmmm.

Am I the only one annoyed with movie editing lately on the basis that it seems that the eventual DVD release is being used as a crutch? Where the heck was Lily in the worst memory scene? I know the scene was filmed because I saw the pre-production shots of it - since JKR gets approval of the script, if it hadn't been important, I doubt they would have gone to the trouble of casting the actress and paying her.

I'm not subscribing to the Snape-madly-in-love theory, but if there's some allegance he feels he owes Lily because she didn't torment him or some respect-as-equals relationship due to her potions skills, I'd prefer to see that alluded to in the films as well rather than some jack-in-the-box revelation in the final scenes, or worse, some scenery-gnawing last gasp admission.

Then again, I'm sure we'll all be referring to our copies of "101 Ways to Prepare Red Herring" after this weekend.

Sam · « **Reply #8 on:** Jul 16, 2007, 04:05:56 PM »

Am I crazy? I finally saw Goblet of Fire recently and Azkabban is still, far and away, my favorite of the four. I'm generally not that big a fan of the books. I appreciate the universe Rawlings has created, but I find her literary style extremely inelegant and plodding. She falls into a lot of the same traps I notice I fall into when I write, so maybe that's why it bothers me. The other three movies seem to be better adaptations of the books, but I think Azkabban a better film.

B E C K · « **Reply #9 on:** Jul 17, 2007, 06:01:42 PM »

What traps? Elaboration please. If only that I want a peak into your own writing style.

Merla also loves Azkaban. It's her fave. I always found it too visually dark. And the iris-in/iris out technique is overused to the point of annoyance.

joe · « **Reply #10 on:** Jul 18, 2007, 12:44:35 AM »

My memory is rubbish, so I can't recall enough of the book to compare it to the movie. I do know that it was dull. Still better than the atrocious Chamberpot however.

Sam · « **Reply #11 on:** Jul 20, 2007, 10:30:47 AM »

Quote from: B E C K on Jul 17, 2007, 06:01:42 PM

What traps? Elaboration please. If only that I want a peak into your own writing style.

I'd have to reread them again to refresh my memory. All I remember is reading it and thinking, "This sounds like how I write...damnit, it sucks."

B E C K · « **Reply #12 on:** Jul 20, 2007, 12:07:33 PM »

Dammit, I spelled it "peak".

Sam · « **Reply #13 on:** Jul 26, 2007, 01:03:22 PM »

Quote from: B E C K on Jul 20, 2007, 12:07:33 PM

Dammit, I spelled it "peak".

So you did. I'm sorry, but a woman that mixes up homonyms cannot bear my children.

B E C K · « **Reply #14 on:** Jul 26, 2007, 02:41:07 PM »

AAARHGKlgjfl;lhg.g!!!!111 I suppose I'll continuing living somehow.

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #15 on:** Jul 26, 2007, 03:25:26 PM »

Quote

I'm sorry, but a woman that mixes up homonyms cannot bear my children.

But if she gets into med school about now, majors in pediatrics and you hold off a few years, she could possibly bare them....

Sam · « **Reply #16 on:** Jul 27, 2007, 11:11:47 AM »

Quote from: Bernie AKA on Jul 26, 2007, 03:25:26 PM

Quote
I'm sorry, but a woman that mixes up homonyms cannot bear my children.

But if she gets into med school about now, majors in pediatrics and you hold off a few years, she could possibly bare them....

You slay me, miss. Bravo.

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #17 on:** Jul 27, 2007, 11:53:31 AM »

A powet I strive to use only for good.

MegatronYES · « **Reply #18 on:** Aug 09, 2007, 10:47:57 AM »

I'll use you for good.

B E C K · « **Reply #19 on:** Aug 09, 2007, 02:39:25 PM »

Hah! Empty promises.

B E C K · « **Reply #20 on:** Aug 09, 2007, 02:40:09 PM »

Also, I can't believe people would rather see Adam Sandler being gay than Harry Potter kissin' Cho. What-eva!

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #21 on:** Aug 10, 2007, 01:07:09 PM »

Quote

I'll use you for good.

As we have no drum roll options, have a pellet.

B E C K · « **Reply #22 on:** Aug 10, 2007, 06:38:50 PM »

I'll give you a pellet.

Or at least that's what Dert would say. Oh, good times.

The D · « **Reply #23 on:** Dec 29, 2007, 03:15:49 PM »

Quote

Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

Uh...no.

After renting Hairy Frotter and the Odor of the Peniseses... I mean Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, I have figured out that I will no longer watch a movie AFTER I have read the book, as I will always be very very disappointed. As in this case.

To add to what Nuri has bitched about:

Sirius' death was beyond lame. In the book it leaves it open to what spell Bellatrix hit him with, although it sounded like it was the stunning curse. In the movie, she hits him with the killing curse, and then rather than freezing up and dying instantly, he steps backwards, gets sucked into the veil, and is STILL CONSIOUS while this is happening (which should not happen with the killing curse, death is instant, you're not going to be consious 5 seconds after).
The final battle suffered from "What the fuck is with all the damn clouds of black/white smoke flying around the place"-itis. Show the fucking actors casting fucking spells, dammit, not fighting as stupid clouds.
The giant was too obviously CG. Don't give me that budget BS.. this is Harry Potter, all he has to do is ask WB for more money. They'll give it, they know the movie will make millions.
Loony is too adorable. Harry needs to marry her, they'd make the craziest couple.
Michael Gambon is just a bad Dumbledore. The other guy should have at least stayed alive until the 6th movie, and then died during filming to make Dumbledore's death scene realistic.
I noticed they omitted Dobby AGAIN. Probably "Budget constraints" again. Poor Dobby.
The dementors in this movie looked like fucking mummies. Wasn't there another director during the third movie? That would explain a lot but it's still no excuse to change things just because a new man's in charge. I hate how these god-damn greedy and pure evil Hollywood directors want to do their own "take" on whatever they're adapting... changing things just for the sake of putting their own lack-of-artistic-touch on the movie because they're attention whores.
Poor Ginny gets all of 2 lines in the whole damn movie. I'm not seeing a relationship between her and Harry here....
The movie FELT too short considering the book. Yes the book is long. No, you can still fit in more into the movie.
They cut out what would have been the most awesome scenes in the whole book, which was where Hagrid kicks the shit out of the Aurors that Delores sends after him. This was the one part that shows how aweseome Hagrid really is. If it was just to "protect the children from senseless violence", the damn movie's PG-13 already. If it was due to lack of time, I would have gratefully accepted a 3-4 hour movie just to fit more of the book in.
I'm still trying to figure out what else they left out of the movie which annoyed me.
Oh yea, there was Harry acting like a dork when he went out with Cho.
One good point was that Umbridge's actress got her "Hem hem" down perfectly.

And uh.. this movie was crap. Can we fire the director and get a new one kplzthnx?

IDE · « **Reply #24 on:** Dec 29, 2007, 04:07:58 PM »

I was hoping you actually had a porno.

Faye Valentine · « **Reply #25 on:** Dec 29, 2007, 04:59:29 PM »

I still haven't seen this movie, and it upsets me cause I was supposed to go see it with my friend but she ditched me and saw it with her ex! fuck her!

B E C K · « **Reply #26 on:** Dec 30, 2007, 12:23:31 AM »

I liked Loony, too. I would've prefered Loony/Harry to Ginny/Harry anyday of the week. Not that I don't think Ginny is cool but Loony is awesome.

Unfortunately, David Yates (the director) is going to direct "Half-Blood Prince".

Wickedly Yours E · « **Reply #27 on:** Dec 30, 2007, 10:12:27 PM »

The last modern film fight sequence that I thought was epic....was Unleashed before or after Return Of the King? I don't know. Then again, I don't watch too many movies anymore.
The only film adaptation that I've found even close to being as good as the novel it was based on was The 13th Warrior. The book was enjoyable but felt pretty dry with the 1st person narrative, while the movie remains in my top 5 to this day.

B E C K · « **Reply #28 on:** Dec 30, 2007, 10:25:06 PM »

I always meant to see that movie but never did.

IDE · « **Reply #29 on:** Dec 31, 2007, 12:55:16 AM »

It would be awesome and fucked up if they included different characters making out (couples that never happened in the fiction) as dvd extras.