Author Topic: Goddammit. (Read 6945 times)

B E C K · « **on:** May 29, 2007, 12:42:59 AM »

I lost a fingernail clipping in my keyboard.

Max Con · « **Reply #1 on:** May 29, 2007, 04:07:27 AM »

Step 1: Turn keyboard upside down.

Step 2: Shake.

Step 3: Disco.

joe · « **Reply #2 on:** May 29, 2007, 10:08:09 AM »

Hahaha. That's nothing.

I don't even want to think about what's living in my keyboard, but one thing I do know is it'll never die of starvation.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #3 on:** May 29, 2007, 11:32:13 PM »

If you want to see a new definition of nasty, pop the keys off a computer lab keyboard sometime. Holy Toledo, what foulness may be found.

B E C K · « **Reply #4 on:** May 29, 2007, 11:37:33 PM »

I did shake it. I banged it and shook it and got some dirt but no clipping. It's a rather large clipping, which is why it was annoying that it sank between keys when I tried to get it. I attacked it with some compressed air too but no dice.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #5 on:** May 29, 2007, 11:59:46 PM »

The keys are hollow...shaped like this when turned upside down, with the stem in the middle attached to and pressing the membrane when you strike it:

\ | | / \__|__|__/

So the fingernail could be up under there when you flip it up. Just forget about it...barring a chance recovery, it'll live with all the hairs and shed skin and oil from your fingers for the rest of the keyboard's useful life.

IDE · « **Reply #6 on:** May 30, 2007, 01:54:50 AM »

This is the perfect time to invite me over

Rama · « **Reply #7 on:** May 30, 2007, 02:23:09 AM »

Just pop all the keys off your keyboard. Then put them back in random order after retriving the clipping.

B E C K · « **Reply #8 on:** May 30, 2007, 03:02:02 AM »

My primary thought was that I can no longer part with this keyboard, as that large clipping would be perfect for a witch to put in a brew and use her powets on me with.

No, seriously. I'm never parting with this keyboard.

B E C K · « **Reply #9 on:** May 30, 2007, 03:04:15 AM »

Quote from: IDE on May 30, 2007, 01:54:50 AM

This is the perfect time to invite me over

What teh hell would that accomplish that benefits me in this particular situation?

Bernie AKA · « **Reply #10 on:** May 30, 2007, 11:53:02 AM »

Put an ant in the keyboard. If nails are clipped outside, ants will show up and carry them off. I think they use them to make glass block effect room dividers.

B E C K · « **Reply #11 on:** May 30, 2007, 01:43:34 PM »

But one of the ants might be a witch in disguise!

Rama · « **Reply #12 on:** May 30, 2007, 01:51:29 PM »

Or he might have an ebay account and sell it to a witch!

You should make arrangements not to pay him till he retrives the clipping, and then when he does you stab him in the back and kill him. It's the only logical soultion.

B E C K · « **Reply #13 on:** May 30, 2007, 03:13:17 PM »

Oh shit. Fuck technology and these progressive ants.

IDE · « **Reply #14 on:** Jun 01, 2007, 08:13:36 PM »

Quote from: Hermeline on May 30, 2007, 03:04:15 AM

Quote from: IDE on May 30, 2007, 01:54:50 AM
This is the perfect time to invite me over

What teh hell would that accomplish that benefits me in this particular situation?

Nothing.

B E C K · « **Reply #15 on:** Jun 01, 2007, 09:47:11 PM »

That's what I thought. Inivitation denied. Thank you for playing. Please try again next year.

IDE · « **Reply #16 on:** Jun 01, 2007, 11:08:53 PM »

wait!

If you have hardwood floors and a headboard on your bed there is the possibility I could pop that clipping out...

B E C K · « **Reply #17 on:** Jun 02, 2007, 11:07:43 PM »

I have neither anyway. Not that I would've let curiousity get the better of me or nothin'...

IDE · « **Reply #18 on:** Jun 06, 2007, 08:58:51 PM »

I'll take that "..." as uncertainty.

B E C K · « **Reply #19 on:** Jun 07, 2007, 04:49:56 PM »

Few things in life are certain, my friend, except death, taxes, and that you will never have a finger up your ass.

IDE · « **Reply #20 on:** Jun 07, 2007, 08:04:29 PM »

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #21 on:** Jun 07, 2007, 09:54:47 PM »

But reportedly not for lack of people trying.

IDE · « **Reply #22 on:** Jun 07, 2007, 10:56:21 PM »

Or just one over zealous person.

B E C K · « **Reply #23 on:** Jun 08, 2007, 02:53:41 PM »

Well you're only 23, so there's time yet for many more attempts.

The D · « **Reply #24 on:** Jun 09, 2007, 11:31:51 AM »

I thought he was 29 and still sadly in college.

IDE · « **Reply #25 on:** Jun 09, 2007, 05:17:43 PM »

I'm not 29!

Aughhh!!

*rocks back and forth*

And even if I was I'd still be a master's student...actually I just graduated so I'm a master.

The guy whose movie I just did (a graduate student in a top ranked film school) is 30 and no one is thinking sadly about it. It's a perfectly acceptable age for grad school...not that I would know though...

being 23 and all.

B E C K · « **Reply #26 on:** Jun 10, 2007, 09:31:12 PM »

If I go for a master's I probably won't get it until I'm 30. And Merla's working on her master's now, and we all know she's a sea hag.

Rodent of Unusual Size · « **Reply #27 on:** Jun 10, 2007, 11:19:44 PM »

Heh, I never knew Sea Hag's real name

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B E C K · « **Reply #28 on:** Jun 10, 2007, 11:56:52 PM »

She's shaved since then.