The Sphere

General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: Derrick on Dec 24, 2009, 06:12:40 PM

Title: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Dec 24, 2009, 06:12:40 PM
...day. Was it too wordy? ???

HAPPY CHRISTMAS!!! :homo:
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Wickedly Yours E on Dec 24, 2009, 09:23:53 PM
A Bit.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Dec 24, 2009, 11:51:43 PM
Still, it has humorous content.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Dec 25, 2009, 07:45:18 AM
I fell asleep at 7 pm and woke up at 3am.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Dec 25, 2009, 11:09:57 AM
Well ok.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Dec 25, 2009, 02:01:18 PM
It doesn't matter.  It was just Poor Christmas.  Less gifts, less cookies, and 99% of my family lives in the same town so it's not like I miss seeing anybody.  My body clock's been completely off this week and I sleep early and wake up between 2 and 4 am.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Dec 25, 2009, 10:58:31 PM
We had a wierd X-Mas. Since we don't really want anything, Kary bought me a new Santoku knife, a car hammer thingy to smash my windshield if anything bad ever happens, and some magneitc spice tins. I bought her a small digital camera, some manga, and a pair of thermal pants. Then we had a good meal at a portuguese restaurant, except her fillet was overcooked and my brother wanted to kill our unattentive waiter. The guy actually tried to talk down my brother from ordering a Blue Moon to order some Miller Lite stuff. Really?

All in all, a good Christmas since the last three were spent at Kary's Mom's house in Georgia. I know she misses mommy, but this year she at least had snow and some decent food. Seriously, who over cooks a fillet mignon?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Dec 26, 2009, 12:42:20 AM
I fell asleep at 7 pm and woke up at 3am.

Nothing wrong with that and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.


and actually this was a pretty good one for me. There was even snow, which never happens. Not a lot of gifts, but about 80% of them where something I actually wanted or liked. (leave it to my aunt to refuse to buy me something I like cause she thinks it's silly. I actually got one of those stupid Hickory Farms basket things. Ugh.)
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Dec 26, 2009, 12:44:54 AM
Me and Kary considered getting one for my Dad, but then we decided to buy him useful things.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Dec 26, 2009, 08:09:53 AM
Quote
a car hammer thingy to smash my windshield if anything bad ever happens,

Now that is a gift from a woman who loves you.  [And that is said completely without sarcasm.]
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Wickedly Yours E on Dec 26, 2009, 12:12:21 PM
Nerf Vulcan mini-gun. Yes.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Dec 27, 2009, 01:27:33 AM
I actually almost bought that when Wal-Mart had it on sale for 25 after Black Friday. I just think unloading with that would be Hella-fun.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Dec 27, 2009, 02:37:15 AM
And I'm surprised this hasn't turned into a Loot thread yet.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Dec 27, 2009, 09:32:02 PM
I don't have any loot.  Pajamas, two make-up bags, a cheap clock that doesn't work, a frog ornament (this aunt always gives me the best simplest gifts--which I prefer because anyone who tries harder fails anyway).  $50 dollars cash that I used for groceries.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Dec 27, 2009, 11:36:05 PM
That's loot. Maybe not a lot, but still loot. You didn't pay for it so it's loot.

And I did slightly better getting MST3k vol. 16, Big Bang Theory Season 1, Star Trek (but not the 2-disc special edition with Klingons bitches) 30 bucks cash, 50 buck chell, 50 buck gift card. A Hickory Farms gift basket (Cranberry Mustard...really?) and a box of T-shirts I'll never wear.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Dec 28, 2009, 11:47:16 AM
I literally have no loot, except the blanket and $10 gift card I took to play one of those stupid games at an extended family gathering. Close family hasn't done any Christmas stuff because two of my siblings and their spouses and children, as well as my parents decided they're going to Disney World, so none of them have any money. Good thing, too, because this month I had to pay a mechanic to tell me a car was in shit condition, then got it scrapped and didn't get the money from it because the car was at a shop that was charging me for 'storage' while I was trying to get a loan to pay off the ridiculous amounts of repairs needed for it. Also had my first months rent at the beginning of the month (same time the car went to shit), and put a small down payment on a car in the first half, which I borrowed from my girlfriend, and so the first half of my month was fucked. Second half wasn't so bad, I payed my girlfriend back and payed the "presumptive tax" on the title transfer out of my second chell (I miss getting three checks a month two months a year). Then, when I think everything's great, the ignition in my new used car is damaged somehow, and has to be repaired or cleaned or unjammed or some shit, and it was Christmas weekend so the locksmith charged a bit extra, and this time I borrowed from my father, and now rent and bills are around the corner. What I'm explaining is that if I'd been able to afford gifts at all, they would have been some shitty fucking gifts.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Sam on Dec 29, 2009, 10:57:44 AM
I got a Crockpot slow cooker, an add-on cymbal for še Rock Band Drums, a flannel shirt, and a Gamestop gift card.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Faye Valentine on Jan 04, 2010, 03:11:52 PM
I don't have any loot.  Pajamas
My uncle gave me pjs too! What kind of gift is that? seriously.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 04, 2010, 03:23:36 PM
A comfy one? As long as your uncle didn't you give you creepy lingerie.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 04, 2010, 04:21:52 PM
...crotchless panties?

"Yeah... didja want to model it for me?"
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 04, 2010, 06:00:52 PM
I don't have any loot.  Pajamas
My uncle gave me pjs too! What kind of gift is that? seriously.

A few years ago I got some I liked but since then, the pj presents have been falling flat.  I have enough shit to sleep in.  Something else, pwease?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 04, 2010, 06:03:57 PM
...another purse.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 04, 2010, 06:20:15 PM
I would not mind it as much as pajamas, to be honest.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Faye Valentine on Jan 04, 2010, 06:34:53 PM
A comfy one? As long as your uncle didn't you give you creepy lingerie.
A manly one :-( I like feminine pjs <3 The top is blue and the bottom is red with black. I'm pretty sure they just went to Macy's and bought the first pj they saw that thought would fit me now D:
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 04, 2010, 06:39:47 PM
:lol:  The one I liked that I got a few years back was kinda masculine-looking, but it was hella comfy.  The last two/three pj sets I've gotten though look like they were made for teen girls.  The pants have little black shoes and dresses all over them.  Spew.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 04, 2010, 07:12:46 PM
Kary wears my PJs, so I sleep naked most of the time.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 04, 2010, 07:51:48 PM
Like you go to sleep and then she peels them off of you and wears them?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 04, 2010, 08:25:56 PM
That sounds like it would make for a hilarious short film.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 04, 2010, 08:38:38 PM
Set to <a href="
>Benny Hill theme music[/url]?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 05, 2010, 05:30:13 AM
Like you go to sleep and then she peels them off of you and wears them?
Nah, she'll pop them on.

This morning though, not a good idea to sleep naked when you set the heat to 60. Bbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rodent of Unusual Size on Jan 05, 2010, 10:39:51 PM
Set to <a href="
>Benny Hill theme music[/url]?

Adding the Benny Hill Theme to Anything Makes it Funny (http://boingboing.net/2008/10/08/adding-the-benny-hil.html)
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Jan 06, 2010, 12:23:52 AM
The world hasn't been the same since Mr. Hill left us.

O.K. someone get into their panties so the rest of us can chase them around and 1.25 speed.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 06, 2010, 04:46:30 AM
*cries while doing so*

Why, Father Padraig?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Jan 06, 2010, 10:41:18 AM
Now wait. It has to be a girl. If one of us guys dresses up in Panties and runs around then we aren't on Benny Hill. We would be on Monty Python.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 06, 2010, 02:00:27 PM
Did you know they hated being compared to Benny Hill?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 06, 2010, 02:31:55 PM
Cocksicle?
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 06, 2010, 03:30:45 PM
Did you know they hated being compared to Benny Hill?

Considering the humor was quite different, I could certainly understand it.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 06, 2010, 06:58:47 PM
I enjoy that when they realized they were done, they quit. More people need to do that in life.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 06, 2010, 09:16:31 PM
You mean Python? I think they actually wanted to quite before they did, but made sure it didn't drag on to badly.

You know what show I wish had lasted longer? Fawlty Towers. Fucking excellent. DON'T TALK ABOUT THE WAR!!
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rodent of Unusual Size on Jan 06, 2010, 09:49:14 PM
Did you know they hated being compared to Benny Hill?
Considering the humor was quite different, I could certainly understand it.

They weren't as funny as Benny Hill, anyway.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 06, 2010, 10:04:53 PM
NO.

THAT IS NOT CORRECT.

FUCK YOU.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rodent of Unusual Size on Jan 07, 2010, 12:07:23 AM
NO FUCK YOU 1000%
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rama on Jan 07, 2010, 12:54:58 AM
Did you know they hated being compared to Benny Hill?
Considering the humor was quite different, I could certainly understand it.

They weren't as funny as Benny Hill, anyway.

LA LA LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU LA LA LA LA LA LA
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Fiero on Jan 07, 2010, 02:47:21 AM
NO FUCK YOU 1000%

Monty Python was over 9000
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Derrick on Jan 07, 2010, 08:25:10 AM
Monty Python? Wow.
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: B E C K on Jan 07, 2010, 01:12:09 PM
*indifferent shrug*
Title: Re: Happy 'dress up a tree and wait for a fatman in a red suit to rape your privacy'
Post by: Rodent of Unusual Size on Jan 07, 2010, 08:02:07 PM
NO FUCK YOU 1000%
Monty Python was over 9000

(http://bonr.shwiggie.com/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=1101.0;attach=3644;image)