The Sphere

General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: Bernie AKA on Nov 03, 2004, 12:27:40 PM

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bernie AKA on Nov 03, 2004, 12:27:40 PM

Call from my sister:

"Hey, (elder fundie nephew) just called with a deal on a car in Tennessee for us, and I had to tell him we'd already bought another one, so if he asks you, we got $500 from the insurance company (they got $1000 when the old car got t-boned) and we had to borrow $700 from you, okay?"

Yeah, dear, whatever.  Thank every deity I can think of that I'll never have to hide my real life away from some greedy-ass entitlement-minded spew of MY loins.  

SHE'S FIFTY-FUCKING-THREE YEARS OLD AND AFRAID OF HER OWN KID!!!  :wacko: GAAAHHHHH!!!!!

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: blanktoe on Nov 03, 2004, 01:45:48 PM

Is this nephew the reason why there will never be Bernie & Eddie babies in the world?

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bernie AKA on Nov 03, 2004, 03:15:40 PM

I first remember not wanting kids when I was about 11-12.  I went through my 20's thinking, "I'm going to hate it but I have to do it; my life is going to be totally destroyed, but I have to do it....".  After I got divorced and the breeding gun was away from my head, it gradually dawned on me:  "No, I DON'T have to have children!"   I told Eddie I didn't want kids on our first date, and he was thrilled.  :D

Fundie nephew simply reconfirms my decision on a regular basis.  :P  

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: B E C K on Nov 04, 2004, 12:01:54 AM

I have this memory of being like eight or nine and thinking "God, I hate kids".  I think I'll always have cat daughters.

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: MegatronYES on Nov 04, 2004, 12:48:44 AM

Can't be with out the prospect of raising my own.

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bitch on Nov 04, 2004, 01:18:23 AM

I never really wanted kids. I'll just go through lots of training and get some wierd pet like a tiger or something to love instead. :D

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: B E C K on Nov 04, 2004, 01:20:28 AM

And then one day we'll be all "what happened to bitch?" and then someone else will post that your tiger ate you.   :o  

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bitch on Nov 04, 2004, 01:22:58 AM

...

Male lion it is, then. :|

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: B E C K on Nov 04, 2004, 01:26:27 AM

Why a male lion?   :blink:  

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bitch on Nov 04, 2004, 01:29:49 AM

Because they're lazy and don't hunt, and would be very mellow if neutered.  

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: B E C K on Nov 04, 2004, 01:32:20 AM

I think you should attach a mane and a penis to a log and tell people it's a male lion.

Title: A little distraction from current events
Post by: Bitch on Nov 04, 2004, 01:43:04 AM

XD!