The Sphere
General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: Rama on Dec 24, 2009, 12:07:26 AM
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http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=206897706628&ref=mf#/group.php?gid=206897706628&ref=mf
Comic I started with an old buddy from High school. Read it, tell me it sucks, and a move on please.
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Simon Says it sucks!
Nah, nah, I haven't read it yet. jk there, little buddy.
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Okay, not shitting anymore...
How am I supposed to read them in order? I've never read comics or anything on FB before.
#3. I thought it was hilarious but I got confused by the layout in regards to two lower panels to the left. I was all, what's the cop doing in that panel. Just saying. Maybe everyone else saw that fine.
Anyway, it's cute. I like.
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I was actually worried about that one and the layout and if people would get the whole Chase was all in his head. In fact I said so in my notes to the artist:
* Notes on this one: This one might be a little too long. And I don’t know if it’s clear the whole chase was just in Simon’s mind. I’ll leave it up to you if you do this one.
But it was early on. This is one of 6 that I wrote not two hours after I asked if I wanted to do a web comic. Now I would have trashed this one, or taken it back to formula to see if I could make it work better.
Oh and there was actually suppose to be 2 Christmas ones up either last night or today, but I guess we are going to be saving those for next Christmas now.
And order doesn't really matter. In fact these aren't in the order I wrote them. The comic he has done are number 1, 5, and 4. But there isn't any overall story arc in these. There are in some of the later ones, but not these.
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Oh and thanks for saying you like it. It means a lot to me considering the only other feedback I got was "That's not funny" in reference to the Dukes of Hazzard one. And "Lacks Character development" I brushed the first one off, but the 2nd one I didn't. No shit it doesn't have any character development (actually it does have a little, but not a lot.) I'm only 3 comics in and it's not be drawn in the order I wrote it. How about you read a few more. I can't force a joke, and their fucking life stories into one 4 panel comic. And I'm mad at myself cause the artist was worried about this (cause it was one of his friends that said it) and I caved and am in the middle of writing a huge story arc that tells the story of how Simon and Liz met. BAH!
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Oh and thanks for saying you like it. It means a lot to me considering the only other feedback I got was "That's not funny" in reference to the Dukes of Hazzard one.
Were they too young to get it or had they just not seen Dukes of Hazzard? [If it's the second one, then it funny because I've never watched it either and I still got it.]
And "Lacks Character development"
Hahaha, seriously?
And I'm mad at myself cause the artist was worried about this (cause it was one of his friends that said it) and I caved and am in the middle of writing a huge story arc that tells the story of how Simon and Liz met. BAH!
Cheat and write it short somehow so it can be done with. Let me tell you--and this is a general, all-encompassing statement and not against your comic in any way--I don't like "character development" that's shoved in my face. Backstories and such are for when you already care about the characters. You've barely started this comic. I nor any one else who reads it have any reason to care how Simon and Liz met. There should be more gags and things like #3 so we can actually get to like the characters and have a feel for them as people. I think it actually said a great deal about Simon and Liz already. In fact, the jokes you use could write the backstory themselves i.e. "Well, you didn't complain about tentacles when we first met." or "Is that why you brought a pony on our second date?" I think showing the backstory will blow opportunities like that.
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It's not bad. Put a character modeled after me in there. Instant comedy gold.
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Oh and thanks for saying you like it. It means a lot to me considering the only other feedback I got was "That's not funny" in reference to the Dukes of Hazzard one.
Were they too young to get it or had they just not seen Dukes of Hazzard? [If it's the second one, then it funny because I've never watched it either and I still got it.
4 years younger then me. Which might be enough. Dukes of Hazzard started in 79 and ended in 85. I mostly saw the show in reruns. This guy would have 1 when the show ended. So more then likely yeah he was too young.
What kinda sucks is most of his friends are from school, but he waited a few years before going to school. So most of his friends that are following this comic at like 4-6 years our Junior. And I'm writing it for people between the ages of 28-40. So must of his buddies are outside my target audience.
And "Lacks Character development"
Hahaha, seriously?
And I'm mad at myself cause the artist was worried about this (cause it was one of his friends that said it) and I caved and am in the middle of writing a huge story arc that tells the story of how Simon and Liz met. BAH!
Cheat and write it short somehow so it can be done with. Let me tell you--and this is a general, all-encompassing statement and not against your comic in any way--I don't like "character development" that's shoved in my face. Backstories and such are for when you already care about the characters. You've barely started this comic. I nor any one else who reads it have any reason to care how Simon and Liz met. There should be more gags and things like #3 so we can actually get to like the characters and have a feel for them as people. I think it actually said a great deal about Simon and Liz already. In fact, the jokes you use could write the backstory themselves i.e. "Well, you didn't complain about tentacles when we first met." or "Is that why you brought a pony on our second date?" I think showing the backstory will blow opportunities like that.
Well I wanted to drop people in it. You just kinda have to accept these characters as they are out of the box. I just don't like going point A to point B to point C. If you were to just read 20 of these things you'd get an idea about these people's characters. (and reading 20 would be easy as I've already written 52 of these) But I chose only to chronicle their first meeting and first date and then just leave it at that. I really do think it's more important to get funny things out there and get people to chuckle and then tell their friends "Hey look at this?" and that's what I need to do at this point.
But there is actually a lot of character development in the first three. The first one shows that Simon isn't a guy that gets his way a lot and he knows it. And in not getting his way you could also say that things don't GO his way very often either. Also it show that Liz is a woman that doesn't like to told what to do and isn't going to be one of those 1950s get me a Sam-itch kinds of women and that she is actually going to be the stronger of the two characters and also the one that's going to be over the top. I always pictured her as the Randall to Simon's Dante. I also had the idea that they are kinda based on Gracie Allen and George Burns too.
The 2nd one shows that Simon is kinda stuck in the past since has has all this old stuff laying around his house. And the panties thing, I mean you can just see him giving her crap about that constantly and that he is like constantly wanting her to wear thongs and she just thinks they are for "Special Occasions" and that they've had this fight a million times already before this and he just isn't going to let it go.
the 3rd shows that Simon is prone to flights of fantasy in his own mind (which happens a lot in this comic, or will when Dwyane draws them) and that he is kinda living in these two worlds.
maybe I should have wrote all that and told him to tell that guy that instead of caving. :P
It's not bad. Put a character modeled after me in there. Instant comedy gold.
Actually thinking about adding two more characters now that I'm done with "Season 1" (52 comics is enough for one a Sunday for a year) But I haven't written any yet and nothing is set in stone. I'm considering having Liz's younger sister coming and living with them to be an antagonist against Simon since he doesn't really have one at the moment.
But I don't think you'd like what I'd do with a character based on you. It would be a one off thing for a joke, or if he was a reoccuring he'd end up being the joke. Since he'd be so the opposite of Simon and Liz that it would just a be a lot of their reacting to the absurd things the guy is saying.
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As long as he having sex with all of Liz's friends I don't care if they make fun of him or not.
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Uh Yeah...I'll take it under consideration.
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No you won't.
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You're right.
But after I said that I did think making a female IDE would be funny.
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In truth I'm not the opposite of simon and liz at all though. And my charming antics would win them over as they always do offline. Unless they're elitest hipster sacks of shit who are no better than the clique of mainstream popular kids they claim are sheep.
Say it ain't so Rama! Say it ain't so!
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I can neither confirm nor deny anything at this point.
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I will confirm everything.
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For Brawl?
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BD