The Sphere
General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: The D on Nov 19, 2007, 11:15:25 PM
-
Meg's avatar reminded me of this, but I checked out this book...the 15th.. and today's the 20th... so 5 days ago, Thursday, so I've been reading Order of the Phoenix for 4 days and I've gotten over halfway through the damn book. Everytime I try to put it down I want to read it more. I think Rowling jinxed the damn books.
This is my running commentary of the book but being halfway through I'll have to go back and skim to miss the other parts I wanted to comment about, some of which may be explained later in the book. But I cheer every time Harry shows some balls and uppercuts Malfoy. And I would have bitchslapped that Umbridge bitch a long time ago for making Harry do those hand-carving sentences bullshit.
I also wonder if Rowling has ever raised teenagers before... I assume when she wrote these her kids were still under 12 because often these kids don't seem too much like real teenagers. They should be running around acting all hormonal and agressive and cocky and horny and fucking and getting preggers and doing drugs and drinking alcohol and shit.
-
Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.
I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.
-
Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.
I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.
Every teenager at the high school I went to was like that. I think half the girls there were preggers. And there were plenty of potheads. Harry Ron and the twins should be getting stoned on whatever wizards use to get high. At least they drink something like alcohol but I have a feeling Butterbeer is non-alcoholic, even considering they're in Britain.
Oh, and the first commentary about this book... why the hell did Rowling name a black man "Shaklebolt"?
-
Ew. Besides, not every teenager is like that.
I need to read those books again. Once I got to Order and HBP, it was skim-city.
Every teenager at the high school I went to was like that.
I wasn't like that. Besides, the whole idea of Harry Potter is so you don't have to read about disgusting kids like that. If I wanted to deal with that shit, I'd go back to work at Long John Silver's. Or watch Maury Povich. Or ask my aunts how my cousins are doing.
-
It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.
-
I can't stand the term "preggers"
-
It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.
It kinda seemed that way to me, too. I think that's why I started skimming. I only read the last one because it was, like, the end to everything.
-
I can't stand the term "preggers"
I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that way. Whenever I read/hear that word I picture the person who used it getting an instant southern accent accompanied by their eye balls looking off in two different directions and a cartoon spring "BOING" sound is heard in the background.
-
To me it makes pregnancy sound like it's a game. To use your same example, the person talking would have about a half-dozen kids running around, with no more than 5 years between the oldest and youngest.
-
To me it makes pregnancy sound like it's a game.
And theres some sort of preg-o-matic bubble involved.
-
Whack-A-Fetus.
Put one of those next to the DDR machine and you'll be sitting pretty in no time.
-
:lol:
I've never got that feeling off the word "preggers". Of course, I've only used it and seen it used on the Internet. I've never heard anyone actually say "preggers" in a rl context.
-
I dated a girl that said it offline.
-
Dated, or banged her after she mysteriously swallowed an aquadot and then the resulting paternal suit?
-
wtf is an aquadot?
-
Plausible deniability won't work here.
-
For some reason the first thing that popped into my head was birth control pill, but that made no sense, then my superior powers of deduction kicked in and I now believe aquadot is some sort of new age date rape drug that I'm unfamiliar with.
amirite?
-
Children's toy that is made in China. When you swallow it, it turns into the daterape drug.
-
Harry must have no testicles. How else can he screw up his dates with Cho so fucking badly?! He's so damn retarded he can't fathom why Cho gets jealous when he even mentions Hermione... duh, when you spend more time with another girl BESIDES your GF, she's gonna get mad!
And when in this novel is Harry not pissed about the tiniest little things? It's like he's perpetually angry.
-
It all went downhill to me at about the fourth book.
I don't think so. I think these books are actually better because they're less childish and more dark, although I'm starting to get tired of Harry being pissed off all the time and even biting the heads off of his closest friends. Although I guess they could justify it by saying he's absorbing the rage from Voldie and becoming more like him, but Voldie never loses his temper, he's very cool and collected and calm. And I still think they don't act enough like teenagers.
I have a great respect for Dumbledore now. Taking on a bunch of wizards and kicking all their asses at once? I mean, Shacklebolt (ha ha!) might have helped him, but I think he just stood there and did nothing.
I have an even greater respect for Hagrid. I can just envision IDE being like a well-toned Hagrid, busting out of his cottage, spells bouncing off his chest like they're nothing, and him tossing wizards 50 feet away with a swipe of his hand. For Hagrid to kick the crap out of all those wizards and take off running, that's just wicked.
And poor Snape. Harry needs to sit down and talk with that guy, let him know he feel sorry for him and he's not like his father. But Harry's too prepetually angry at everyone and sorry for his self to actually care about other's feelings.
-
Voldemort gets pissed all the time in the last book.
-
That's because those meddling kids keep on interfering with his plans. And their dog too.
-
Poor Snape? But Snape was a cranky-ass that doesn't know the meaning of "get over it!" Screw Snape.
-
Neither does Harry, apparently.
-
I finished yesterday and started on Half Blood Prince.
Poor Snape? But Snape was a cranky-ass that doesn't know the meaning of "get over it!" Screw Snape.
I meant Poor Snape on how he was treated as a kid. Yea, he needs to get over it. And so does Harry. Blaming everyone for Sirius's death?
And how the hell do they know Sirius is dead? They don't even bother explaining what the hell that arch with the veil is. He falls through an arch and through a veil and he's dead? Why? Explain why he's dead? I mean, the arch could be a portal to another dimension for all we know, or a time travelling portal. Did it lead to the dinosaur age and he got eaten? He should have died in an epic way, like killing two death eaters at once while he dies. Not falling through a fucking arch!
-
It came off as a portal into death for me. It was all ghostly and shit. I don't know what you use such a portal for but I imagine you could call spirits to the veil and perhaps bottle nether from the underworld for use as magical components.
-
I meant Poor Snape on how he was treated as a kid. Yea, he needs to get over it. And so does Harry. Blaming everyone for Sirius's death?
Harry's still a kid and Sirius recently died. Snape's an adult (arguably) and his shit happened ages ago, and he persists in being a grudge-holding whiner.
-
I think snape is more pissed about losing the love of his life to the man who tormented him from K-12 than just the fact that james pwned him regularly.
-
I noticed the chapter where Sirius dies is called "Beyond the Veil" which is often an expression used for the afterlife. And Dumbledore refers to the room as the "Death Chamber" so I guess the archway is a portal to the afterlife. But Rowling does such a crappy job of explaining what the portal is that I still think it's a shitty way for Sirius to go.
Also, I remember that Luna blew up Pluto in the planet room. Apparently she could see the future and knew the planet would be removed from the list.
-
I like the way she did it. I don't need a writer to draw a schematic of the death portal and list all of it's uses. But then I like mysterious things.
-
Why is there even a death portal? Who created such a thing? Why didn't the ministry of magic destroy it?
-
I would create a death portal and if the ministry destroyed it I'd be pissed. I've already stated a couple of reasons why someone might want one. I'm sure wizards are curious about the nature of death just like the rest of us. Do they ever mention god in the potter books I don't remember?
-
wotcher?
-
wotcher??
-
It's what Tonks says to Harry all the time. "Wotcher, Harry?"
Damn them British and their butchering of the English language... yes I know they spoke it first, but why do they have to add all these bloody words?
The arch in the death room was to study the afterlife, but now I wonder why they didn't put a cover over it or something, so people don't accidently fall into it. I think Harry could sue the Ministry of Magic for that one... for not having a barrier over the arch while not in use.
-
I'm sure there's a dirty joke in there somewhere but I don't have it.
-
I really don't understand relationships in popular culture. In sitcoms, the husband and wife fight and bicker about lots of things, and then they make up at then end. In Anime, it seems to be the bitchiest, most abusive female who hooks up with the nerdy male at the end.
And then you have Ron and Hermione. The best case for future domestic abuse and violence and eventual devorce I've ever seen. They should make a tagline: "The couple that fights each other, stays together."
After 4 books where people acted like 8 year olds when it came to the opposite sex ("eww, girls have cooties!"), and then a book where teenagers acted like middle schoolers when it came to the opposite sex ("I have a crush on so-and-so but I'm too afraid to ask them out.. "), we finally have a book where everyone's making out with everyone else and screwing each other behind the pages as well. Harry is still a dork and completely fails at having any kind of relationship at all, even though he has his own groupies and fan club. Ron has about 20 women draped over him wanting to screw him silly.
And yet, people still fight and argue and get violently angry at each other, especially Ron and Hermione. And yet I'm expected to believe they eventually get together by the 7th book, even though I don't see hardly any chemistry between them? Unless you count constant fighting chemistry. It just doesn't make sense.
The only way any of this makes sense is if I see the Normal American Couple as being a man and woman who bicker constantly. Since all of American media (like sitcoms) protrays the Normal American Couple as being a man, and a woman, and a lot of fighting over stupid shit, then all of a sudden Ron's and Hermione's relationship makes SENSE!
Apparently, this whole time that I believed a healthy relationship was where two people loved each other and worked together to have a good life (with occasional disagreements but little fighting), I was wrong. A healthy relationship is with lots of fighting! Oh how mine eyes have been opened.
-
The arch in the death room was to study the afterlife, but now I wonder why they didn't put a cover over it or something, so people don't accidently fall into it. I think Harry could sue the Ministry of Magic for that one... for not having a barrier over the arch while not in use.
Sirius only fell behind the veil after being killed by Bellatrix Lestrange. If you re-read that chapter, the two were fighting, then there was a green light, then Sirius went into the arch. And then in later books, it's said that Bellatrix killed Sirius. You need to pay attention.
As for the couples thing, for one, the books were originally intended for children and for two, they're in a very prestigious private school in Britain. While I'm sure there was much fornicating and so on happening, most of them had other things to worry about. And they weren't all, "Ew, cooties." Harry had a crush on Cho from the third book until the fifth. Ginny was smitten with Harry from the second book on. And there's been sexual tension between Ron and Hermione almost from the beginning. Yeah, they argue, but you know they just want to jump each other's bones and only shout because they can't and they're mad about it.
-
If Ron and Hermione had a perfect relationship that wouldn't be very interesting now would it? The bickering keeps you turning the pages.
-
The arch in the death room was to study the afterlife, but now I wonder why they didn't put a cover over it or something, so people don't accidently fall into it. I think Harry could sue the Ministry of Magic for that one... for not having a barrier over the arch while not in use.
Sirius only fell behind the veil after being killed by Bellatrix Lestrange. If you re-read that chapter, the two were fighting, then there was a green light, then Sirius went into the arch. And then in later books, it's said that Bellatrix killed Sirius. You need to pay attention.
Harry saw Sirius duck Bellatrix’s jet of red light: He was laughing at her. “Come on, you can do better than that!” he yelled, his voice echoing around the cavernous room. The second jet of light hit him squarely on the chest. The laughter had not quite died from his face, but his eyes widened in shock. ...It seemed to take Sirius an age to fall. His body curved in a graceful arc as he sank backward through the ragged veil hanging from the arch... And Harry saw the look of mingled fear and surprise on his godfather’s wasted, once-handsome face as he fell through the ancient doorway and disappeared behind the veil, which fluttered for a moment as though in a high wind and then fell back into place.
I do pay attention. It's not mentioned what Bellatrix hits Sirius with, but because of the spell he dodged beforehand, it's assumed it's a spell that has a jet of red light, which is probably the stunning curse. I find it hard to believe that she hit him with the killing curse because he still had expressions on his face afterwards, where if he died instantly, his face would be blank.
Ginny was smitten with Harry from the second book on.
I think that's more groupie behavior or hero worship, the obsession girls have for someone they think is hot and brave and awesome, like a girl fawning over an actor or rock star.
And there's been sexual tension between Ron and Hermione almost from the beginning.
The bickering between Ron and Hermione seemed to be more like sibling bickering. From the first book until the 6th book Ron seemed oblivious to the opposite sex. In book 4, when him and Harry take the two girls to the ball, Ron is completely uninterested in his date and acts like being in her presence, let alone holding her hand and kissing, is disgusting. Odd behavior for someone who's 14. He shows similar lack of interest in females through book 5 and it's only in HBP that he seems to show any feelings for Hermione, let alone any female, since it's only now that he gets a girlfriend (then practically dives in her pants!). Hermione on the other hand has shown feelings for Ron since at least book 4 when she was angry and depressed he didn't ask her to the ball. However she's probably mad at Ron because he doesn't share her feelings. In order to have sexual tension the feelings have to go both ways, and until book 6 it seemed to be going one way, Hermione had some feelings for Ron but Ron didn't share those feelings. If it is sexual tension, they've had 6 books to shag each other and only in this book are they actually seeing other people. And it's more than bickering, it almost seems like they're going to kill each other. Not exactly a healthy relationship.
If Ron and Hermione had a perfect relationship that wouldn't be very interesting now would it? The bickering keeps you turning the pages.
This may be true, but I'm getting sick of disfunctional relationships being the norm in Hollywood (and Japan). No wonder the divorce rate's so high in this country.
-
Actually, they fulfill each other perfectly. Ron the whiney do-nothing unless practically threatened submissive marrying Hermione the ultimate dominant. Yawn. Too bad she didn't turn seventeen in time for Snape to give her some detentions Ajax wouldn't clean off. Probably would have done both of them a world of good. :laugh:
-
I just wish Harry had banged Luna instead of Ginny. Luna was so much cooler, and her craziness complimented Harry so much. :(
-
I wish he had banged them both...at the same time
/sigh
-
So does he, IDE. *hug*
-
I really don't understand relationships in popular culture.
Because they're... fictional?
-
If they were fictional, then domestic abuse rates would be at an all time low, and every dick and jane out there wouldn't be filing for divorce. And Christians complain that GAYS are destroying marriage... marriage was destroyed long before teh gays appeared.
-
You said in pop culture. Why that encourages comparison with real abuse rates, I'm uncertain. Unless those are also fictional.