The Sphere
General Garbage => Tropical Paradise of Hard Shelled Fruits => Topic started by: IDE on Jun 02, 2006, 10:53:56 AM
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Drunk driving for teh fail!
Bring on the thousands of dollars in court costs, fines, and legal fees!
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And this is why I don't drive.
I would probably end up like you in less that a week.
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You dumb fucktard. A cab costs 20 bucks, and now because of your stupidity, you not only fail yourself, but you could have hurt someone. You fucking loser, maybe now you'll get some sense.
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The only thing I would be worried about if I was him is of getting a DUI.
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When I was on the main page and I saw there was a thread called "I spent the night in jail!" as the most recent posting, I knew it had to be either Ide or D.
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HAHA I actually thought it was D at first
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I wasn't pulled over for driving badly I was pulled over because my tail light was out. I was only .04 over the legal limit which is .08 and is supposed to be 2 beers...so I was 3 beers. Exactly how fucked up are you after 3 beers?...Granted I weigh 230 lbs and had drunk alot more than that but I had deliberately not gotten too drunk because I knew I had to drive back. Still I am a fucktard for tempting fate with my tail light out and fate has bitch slapped me my friends...and the slap doth sting.
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Been there...
...spending a night in jail and paying court fees, not drunk driving.
I feel manlier than IDE right now. I just swapped the alternator in my car by myself, which was made easier since the bolts weren't rusted/seized on, and saved myself a hundred or two. Next will be spark plugs and an oil change, I'll play classical rock, lift weights and oil my non-existant pecs, and I'll be real manly.
At the auto store... some 40ish black guy tried to sell me a large gold chain. Do I look black?
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So in other words, you were punched in the donut?
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And if he wasn't, he should be.
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Figuritively speaking...yes.
But even better is that I've found out that the kid who didn't blow got out around the same time I did even though I was told oh god I can't even type it...If I type it I swear I'll smash this computer, then I'll go kill my roomate in his sleep, the police will gun me down...but I'll rise from the grave and keep on killing.
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Ha, good on Fate.
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Figuritively speaking...yes.
But even better is that I've found out that the kid who didn't blow got out around the same time I did even though I was told oh god I can't even type it...If I type it I swear I'll smash this computer, then I'll go kill my roomate in his sleep, the police will gun me down...but I'll rise from the grave and keep on killing.
I see nothing but benefit for me.... You should type it.
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Well now that I'm sedated I think I can go ahead give you the gist of it without running through the dry wall between here and the kitchen like the juggernaut.
Basically the guy who didn't blow was told infront of me that he was going to be held until first appearance which would mean a whole other day in jail, so I blew because I didn't want to spend a whole other day in there, I can't sleep in jails and it drives me bat shit crazy, if I was ever locked up for a prolonged period of time then that aforementioned killing spree would happen for sure culminating in self termination if for no other reason so that I could finally sleep....forever...but I digress.
The guy that didn't blow was not held for an extra day that was an empty threat to get him to blow and my weakness at not being able to be in a cage caused me to do whatever it took to get the fuck out of there as soon as possible...only to find out later that...OJHAD:YIV UA
KO{bdamgsbfdvb.v?>....NEEEEEEEED MORE XANAX! NOWWWWWWWWWWWWW
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"The guy didn't blow?"
He wouldn't cum on you or do you kids have new slang these days?
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You'll know what im talking about when you get a DUI which I now wish upon everyone.
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"The guy didn't blow?"
Breathalizer.
You'll know what im talking about when you get a DUI which I now wish upon everyone.
The only influence I want to be under is "of life"!
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"No drugs for me. Jesus gives me a permanent high."
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He lifts me up. To the highest mountain.
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He doesn't do anything for me.
You all are fuckers.
Fuckers, I say.
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God created the earth and all living things on it. So technically he created all the ingredients in coke, crack, meth, heroine and all our favourites. So technically it's sort of true... depending on what side of the convoluted bitch for nothing God is Jesus/Jesus is te son of God/Jesus is a prophet debacle you're on.
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Jesus is nothing more than a fictional character in a Phillip K. Dick novella. Why people take him so seriously, I'll never know...
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They take him seriously 'cause he's written some great sci-fi stories.
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I wasn't talking about Phillip K. Dick, but rather his 'Jesus' character.
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I know. I was making a joke.
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Well played.
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I use to believe in God...but then the other day I went "Please God don't let this be a preview for another Fast and Furious." and it was...God is dead.
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I just ate a double-quarter pounder. God hates me.
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You could gain like... half a pounder!
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I'm still waiting for "the Fast and the Furious 4: Motocross Jesus".
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You know a movie's really bad when even Vin Diesel refuses to be a part of it...
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HAHAHA! :lol:
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I can't believe how gay he was on the Daily show. So gay. So very gay. He was lisping an' everthin'. I was like "Queen, please!"
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Vin Diesel have slept with at least half of the women in Manhattan. True story.
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In other words, he fell asleep at numerous Avon parties.
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Well that happens.
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I can't believe how gay he was on the Daily show. So gay. So very gay. He was lisping an' everthin'. I was like "Queen, please!"
Yes I saw it to. What a queer.
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I was considering applying to be vin diesel's assitant. I still have the application.
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Make sure you wear an anal chastity belt...
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I was considering applying to be vin diesel's assitant. I still have the application.
Oh that would be perfect. You could shave each other's hair, compare your favorite bars to prey on women too young for you, and you could stay up all night talking about squat thrusts and weight lifting. And when "Vinny" has a nightmare you can rock him back to sleep. It's a match made in heaven.
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I was thinking more along the lines of killing him and assuming his identity.
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and his STDs, that guy has more STDs than the NY metro line
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And you should see the creams in NY Metro's medicine cabinet.
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I read "Vin Diesel's assailant".
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Still works
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For you, when he gives it to you up the butt.
FACE!
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I was considering applying to be vin diesel's assitant. I still have the application.
Oh that would be perfect. You could shave each other's hair, compare your favorite bars to prey on women too young for you,
:lol: :lol: :lol: Ramathat was AWESOME HAHAHAHA :lol: :lol:
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Isn't Vin Diesel gay?
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I heard that rumor too.
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fine....They can prey on young boys.
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That's outside my area of prefernce and expertise.
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I'm sure he can teach you. You can be his understudy. HA!
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Don't project your sordid fantasies onto me!
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Vin Diesel probably would want your man meat, being you're his assistant. He might ask you for assistance pouring cum into his rectum.
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Don't project your sordid fantasies onto me!
If you get the job I wouldn't use "sordid fantasies" in the same sentence as "project" when you talk to him. You might not like the end result.
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Ok we're gonna erase all this gay imagery and go with this instead:
So I take the job and then one day Vin says to the casting director of his latest summer blockbuster "Yo, you know who would be perfect to play the villian...?" and thus a new star is born ushering in at least what? 10-20 more years of 18 yr old chicks?
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He'll more likely say:
"You know who would be great to play the villain?......Damnit IDE, I told you to get my goddamn coffee. And it better be decaff latte with soymilk or I'll fire your ass and get a Mexican to do it for half what I pay your sorry ass. Now as I was saying before the help interrupted....."
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That's a producer/writer tract
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Better than the other tract he could be working on.
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That's a producer/writer tract
Man if I was the executive producer and Vinny talked to me like that he'd find himself thrown off the lot faster then he could say "anal beads please". Big dumb bald muscle bound morons are a dime a dozen, Espeically in Hollywood. He could be replaced, and he'd never be the "Star" or "Hero" of any movie I wrote or produced so we could live without him.
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Man if I was superman I would totally fly around the world backwards to go back in time...
I'm talking about what happens years before you ever become an executive anything.
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Vin Diesel probably would want your man meat, being you're his assistant. He might ask you for assistance pouring cum into his rectum.
:lol:
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Time to venture forth into the night undaunted by past mistakes...
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huh?!?! Are you saying you swing that way?
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You know it's hard to tell with you when you're joking. I'm stuck here wondering "does she really think that based on the above statement?" or is it some poor attempt at humor. Either way you've won because it took me 9 seconds to post this and I'll never have them back.
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Also, did you know you're not allowed to drink in this country after getting a DUI? (at least for a certain time period) They put me right back out on the road where I can run people over but I can't have anything to drink even in the privacy of a very public place where my arresting officer happened to show up.
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I'm talking about what happens years before you ever become an executive anything.
Well if I was just a scriptwriter...I'd probably not be anywhere near Vin Diesel. My job would be done and over with before a single frame was shot. I'd only have to get involved again if they wanted a rewrite, which wouldn't require me to be on set. Unless I was the director as well, and then I'd have almost the same powet as the EP. If I was just a producer I wouldn't have to deal with him either cause it's the EP to deal with the actors and what not, doubtful I'd even meet him. I'd more have to sit through dailies and other boring tedious stuff to make sure the flick was living up to the Producers exceptions, and handling shit like making sure the studio was happy and not getting their panties in a bunch over stuff. It wouldn't be my job to deal with Vinny.
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No i mean just hazing in general not from vin neccesarily.
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I'd only want to meet Jon Voight, Bruce Willis, and maybe Clint Eastwood.
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Also, did you know you're not allowed to drink in this country after getting a DUI? (at least for a certain time period) They put me right back out on the road where I can run people over but I can't have anything to drink even in the privacy of a very public place where my arresting officer happened to show up.
Yeah I knew that. If your officer stops by and smells at least a little alcohol in your breath, you are fucked.
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No i mean just hazing in general not from vin neccesarily.
Eh...I usually work alone, so I wouldn't have to worry about that. Unless I spank myself with a paddle...but that's not hazing that's just fun.
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Ever see swimming with sharks?
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I've swam with sharks before. Pretty interesting.
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*Face Palms*
Ever see swimming with sharks?
No. but given the title and context of the current conversation I can guess what it is about. But at the same time I'm not looking to "break" into screen writing. In fact, it's entire possible that I'll never write a script or be part of a movie production ever in my life. I could spend the rest of my life as a novelist (if I'm lucky. Fingers crossed) and where as novelist does take shit from publishers, they almost always work alone (unless they choose to take on partner or someone rewrites their book) and are rarely hazed. What I would do would be comparable to what Anne Rice did with 1994's Interview with the Vampire. Where the author of the novel, also wrote the script.
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Yeah I'm looking to break in and hopefully I'll be working with my best friend directly but that's not a sure thing. I forgot who it was he was working for it was some huge producer and the guy once asked him to call and make reservations at a restaurant in LA. So my friend calls and makes the reservation for the time he was told to make it.
Then his boss calls and asks:
Did you make the reservation? Yes
What restaurant was it? Friend gives him the name of the restaurant
What number did you call? Friend tells him the number and starts to realize something isn't right...
Who did you talk to? The Maitre D (or however you spell that)
What was his name? ...finally my friend doesn't have an answer and bam! The hazing commences!
Sometime later he told this guy to fuck off and the guy fired him. He thought this was going to look bad until he got his next job and they told him that guy fires 15 assistants a year and that being fired by him is like a coming of age experience.
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I could never deal with that shit.
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I just want to be the guy that yells "Get out of my office!!!" before throwing a phone at someone.